Life in San Fransokyo
by thearendork
Summary: A collection of one-shots featuring Tadashi and Elsa. In times of joy and pain, they will always be there for each other.
1. Aftermath

_Note:_

The first portion of this fanfic is the first time I've written Tadashi x Elsa. It can't even be considered a ficlet because it was more of a snippet, something I banged out together to get rid of the Tadashi x Elsa feels. Sometime later, I started working on my official Elsashi/Tadelsa/Elsadashi/whateverthehecktheshipiscalledfanfic called One Year. But since I'm running into a block in writing Chapter Five, I decided to polish the snippet I first wrote and expanded it, which ended up into this. This isn't part of One Year, by the way, but it's more of like a…well, a proto-fic, I guess.

By the way, Chapter Seven of One Year is fighting me so hard, so I went a little nuts and decided to repost the Tadelsa one-shots to collate them under one title. Productive, isn't it (LOL no)? Seriously though, I'm going to focus on the one-shots until I get my groove back in updating One Year. Please bear with me.

Usual disclaimers apply—Disney owns Frozen and Big Hero 6, and both movies' characters.

* * *

"Elsa, wait!" she heard him cry out behind her, his voice almost drowned out by the rain. The weather reflected the storm of emotions churning within her—grief, anger, guilt, sadness—these seethed within her, squeezing the breath out of her lungs as she ran. At the back of her mind Elsa knew she was being reckless—running blindly in the rain is dangerous.

But she didn't care. She had to get away. Get away before she could hurt Tadashi…or worse.

"It's not your fault!"

Those four words broke through the haze of pain and anguish, causing her to skid to a stop. "Not my fault?" she snapped, spinning on her heel to face him. "Not my fault?" her voice rose to an almost hysterical pitch, her tears mixing with the rain. "How did you know that, Tadashi? Were you there? Were you there when I tripped and accidentally hit my sister with my powers? When I almost killed my sister?" she raged at him, her chest heaving from the onslaught of memories.

She couldn't see Tadashi anymore, couldn't hear him. But she heard the high-pitched beeps, instruments crashing to the floor, hurried footsteps and shouts. She saw doctors huddled over Anna, frantically trying to keep her vital signs stable until an old family friend helped revive her—but at the cost of her memories. She saw her parents' shocked faces as she gasped at them that it was an accident. She felt her father's embrace when he bade her farewell at the airport, and his pain over what happened to his daughters. "I'm sorry," she whispered as she broke away, struggling to contain her tears. "I'm sorry for what happened to Anna."

"It's not your fault," her father had said.

But she couldn't believe it. She would NEVER believe it.

Elsa was jarred back to the present by a pair of strong arms wrapping around her in a tight embrace. "Wh—Tadashi, what the hell? Let me go!" She struggled against him, but he held her tighter instead.

"I'm not letting you go. Not until you believe that it's not your fault." Tadashi paused, loosening his arms around her slightly to pull back and look at her. "I'm not giving up on you." His voice rang with the certainty of a vow, his determined brown eyes boring into her vulnerable blue ones. "I'm not giving up on you, you hear me?"

Her eyebrows snapped together in a fierce glower. "Don't be stupid, Tadashi," she hissed. "Give up and walk away while you still can. I'm a mon—"

"Shut up. Just shut up!" He shook her once to cut off her incoming tirade. "You never were a monster, Elsa. You…you—" Tadashi clenched his jaw as he breathed heavily, his brown eyes almost glaring at her agitated blue ones. "I don't know your whole story, but from what I pieced together, I know you're the most loving, generous person I know. You're the only one I know who was strong enough to make the sacrifice that you did."

Elsa opened her mouth to counter him, but he spoke first. "But you know you need to fix things with your sister, right?" he said, his voice gentling. "It's been a long time."

"It's too late," she replied bleakly, dropping her gaze to his chest. She couldn't bear to look at him—surely he was mistaken about what he thought of her. Only the worst person in the world would abandon a sibling during her time of need. Where was she when their parents died? Hiding away in San Fransokyo, frozen by fear.

She was so selfish.

"It's never too late." The strong note of determination in his voice made her look up at him. "I know it's hard, but you can do it. If you need my help, I'm here. I'm always here for you. And I repeat: I'm not giving up on you. You don't know it yet, but your sister needs you. I…" he trailed off, swallowing hard. "I need you, too."

She could only nod slowly in dumb fascination, unable to tear her gaze away from his. He needed her? What could she possibly offer him? But she soaked up his words hungrily to store them in her memories and add to her too few good ones. The raindrops clung to his eyelashes and plastered his bangs to his forehead, and Elsa couldn't remember the last time she'd seen something so…beautiful.

Tadashi must have felt the same too, because something about him shifted. He lifted his hand to her cheek and cradled it gently, wiping the tears and rain with his thumb. Elsa felt her heart beating madly in her chest when she saw him bend down slowly, hesitantly, as if asking for her permission to…

To kiss her?

Before she knew it, his lips had gently touched hers, causing her mind to go completely blank. But her instincts kicked in—her eyelids slid closed as her arms crept up to his neck to pull him closer as she returned his kiss, seeking oblivion in the warmth he radiated despite the rain.

* * *

The first thing Elsa did upon reaching her apartment was to make a beeline to her room. "Wait here," she instructed Tadashi, who was soaking wet from the downpour. The rain fell steadily outside as thunder growled from a distance. She quickly toweled herself off to keep from dripping on her carpet then rummaged through her closet, firmly keeping herself focused on finding her baggiest sweatpants and a towel for her guest.

"Here, Tadashi." Elsa handed him the pants and towel when their fingertips brushed as she did, and she ignored the tingles that traveled up her arm at the contact. "You'd better shower to get warmed up. I don't want you catching a cold or something."

"What about you?" Tadashi asked, uncharacteristically solemn. They were in Elsa's apartment, which was only ten minutes away from where they were earlier—where they kissed, which was that cherry-blossom lined path they first met, in the rain. They had stared at each other for what seemed an eternity when the kiss tapered off, her mind a complete blank as she wrestled with the chaos of emotions swirling within her. Practicality reasserted itself when Tadashi had blinked and broke the spell, prompting her to suggest that they get dried off at her apartment since it was nearby.

Elsa forced herself back into the present. "The cold doesn't bother me, remember?"

"Ah."

Elsa could see questions crowding in Tadashi's eyes, but was grateful he kept them to himself. She still wasn't sure if she could answer them, but if he did, she would try. It was the least she could do, considering he had accepted her despite…well, everything.

Her mind was still awhirl from what happened earlier. She felt drained, but strangely hopeful too. The atmosphere between them was charged with anticipation, and she couldn't decide if it was a good thing or not.

They still had a lot to talk about. That kiss—her mind was telling her that it was a mistake, but her heart was stubbornly saying no.

Elsa took a deep, calming breath and decided to focus on other things—practical ones, like putting away her wet clothes to dry and to don a bathrobe, one that covered her from her neck to ankle, as she waited for him to finish showering. Her heart leapt to her throat when she heard the door of her bathroom open about ten minutes later. Opening her bedroom door a crack, she peeked out and saw Tadashi standing next to her sofa looking around, the towel slung over his right shoulder, and his wet clothes rolled up and clutched in his left hand. Her eyes traveled down the strong column of his neck, down to his smooth chest and flat stomach—she wasn't surprised he had an athletic physique. She saw a suggestive trail of hair disappearing down the waistband of her sweatpants which hung low on his hips, prompting her to wrench her gaze up to his arms. She eyed the contours of his biceps, down to his strong forearms, to his large hands, remembering how warm they felt against her bare skin.

Elsa closed her door as quietly as she could before leaning against it, releasing a slow breath. She had Tadashi in her apartment.

Shirtless and fresh from his shower. Probably without underwear, she guessed.

Elsa's eyes bugged out at the last thought. Since when had her mind gone gutter-diving?

 _Probably ever since you started dreaming of him wearing only a towel and very little else. That story of his about the last time he visited a Japanese hot spring got you hot and bothered, didn't it?_ a little voice whispered wickedly in her ear, referring to an amusing story he told her back then involving some kind of prank. _Especially after out of curiosity you researched what onsen were like._

Damn her curiosity. And damn him for being so—

Damn, damn, damn. Elsa couldn't even think the word, but she sure could see it in her mind's eye. Tadashi rising out of the steam like some kind of god, his hand beckoning her to join him. She'd slide into the water as he wrapped his large hands around her waist, while her arms snaked around his neck. They'd stand in the water, their naked bodies almost touching, heat swirling all around them. She would be lost in his brown eyes, her own fluttering shut as he bent down to touch his lips to hers…

"Elsa?" His muffled voice shattered the fantasy. "I'm done showering. It's your turn."

 _Quit being such a chicken and just get on with it._ Summoning every ounce of determination, she opened her door and marched past Tadashi, her gait stiff. Elsa closed the door behind her and let out a sharp exhale, jumping when she heard three quick raps on the door.

"Do you have a bag I can use for my clothes?"

"Better if you washed them. Washing machine's in the room next to the bathroom. Can't miss it," she replied, her back against the door.

"Thanks." Elsa listened carefully for the receding sound of Tadashi's footsteps and sighed, shaking her head at how silly she was being. She squeezed her eyes shut as she counted to five before preparing to shower.

 _What's going to happen after this?_ she wondered as she lathered her hair with her favorite strawberry-scented shampoo. Normally, that question filled her with dread, but now...

Now, it filled her with anticipation. Elsa bit her lip, remembering the warm press of his mouth against hers, and tried not to be too hopeful. She had never been lucky, and despite the signs that something between them had shifted dramatically, old habits die hard—she doubted she'd get lucky now.

* * *

Tadashi tried not to be too hopeful.

He knew Elsa was wary of him because of what happened between them in the rain. It's not like he was some kind of love expert, but he had a pretty strong hunch that it was Elsa's first kiss. If Elsa were like any other girl, she probably would have viewed it as romantic or something.

But Elsa wasn't any other girl. Elsa was special. Like, really special.

 _Ice powers. Who knew?_

Tadashi winced and adjusted the waistband of the sweatpants Elsa lent him—it was a bit of a tight fit, with the cuffs about four or five inches above his ankles. Elsa was a little taller than the average woman, but he was six feet tall, which made borrowing her clothes a little ridiculous.

He tried not to think about how his borrowed clothes had touched her skin, willing his body to behave. Gritting his teeth, he threw his own into the washing machine, set the time and temperature, and poured in a bit of detergent.

He valiantly tried not to think of Elsa next door, showering…

 _Dammit, stop right there!_

Tadashi shook his head to clear it from the haze of desire that threatened to cloud his vision. Of all the things he should be thinking about—Elsa didn't need that sort of pressure from him. He wanted to kick himself for blurting out that he needed her. What sort of cad was he to say that when she was obviously so troubled about her sister?

 _Stupid, selfish jerk._

He stalked out of the room but had not counted on colliding with Elsa, who had just finished showering and drying her hair and was making a break toward her room.

"Oof!"

His hands automatically reached out to grasp her upper arms to steady her, causing her to look up at him with startled eyes that also held a hint of…invitation? "Whoa there! Uh, Elsa." Their faces were close enough for him to see how her pupils had dilated.

He really should let her go. But the strawberry scent that wafted up his nose, the intense, brilliant blue of her eyes, and her parted, rosy lips left him paralyzed. It really was just a matter of bending down to close the gap between them, to press his body against hers and revel in her softness and warmth.

Tadashi was saved from his dilemma when Elsa made the decision for them—she shrugged his hands off her arms and seized his face to pull him down for a kiss.

While his mind scrambled to catch up on what was happening, his arms automatically wound around Elsa's slender waist to bring her body against his. Her mouth opened under his and he plunged in hungrily, greedily, his tongue clashing and playing with hers as he closed his eyes and lost himself in her. He could scarcely believe what was happening—that he held the girl that haunted both his waking hours and dreams in his arms, her heart pounding madly against his as her hands roamed over the bare skin of his back and his neck before she raked them over his hair.

Tadashi wasn't sure how they managed it but they ended up on her couch, with Elsa straddling his lap as they separated for air. Her hair was wild from the way his hands had tangled within them, her cheeks flushed, the pupils of her eyes so wide that only a thin ring of blue remained, and her lips kiss-swollen. The collar of her robe gaped to reveal her graceful, swan-like neck, smooth, porcelain skin, and a hint of cleavage.

She bit her lower lip which almost undid him.

"Elsa, I…" For all his brashness and honesty about his feelings toward her, Tadashi couldn't bring himself to say what he wanted so badly.

That he wanted her.

He wanted to lose himself within her completely, to surrender his heart and soul to her keeping. But words failed him now underneath her penetrating scrutiny. He was afraid to scare her off with the strength of his feelings and desire for her. Besides, she needed a friend right now.

So Tadashi held his tongue. The ball was in her court, and whatever she decided, he swore to himself that he will abide by it.

But he couldn't bring himself to regret the fact that he had kissed her. Twice, even.

It seemed like an eternity passed before Elsa moved—she exhaled and bent to rest her forehead against his, her hands cradling his jaw tenderly as she closed her eyes.

"Please stay," she whispered.

Tadashi felt his pulse skyrocket at her words. "Are you sure?" he asked, trying to keep calm.

"Yes." Elsa lifted her head to look him straight in the eye. "I need—I need you. Don't leave me alone tonight." He expected to see apprehension, but instead there was a calm resolve within them.

The least he could do was to promise her something.

"I won't leave you alone," he vowed. "Ever."

* * *

An overwhelming sense of relief flooded over Elsa at Tadashi's words. "Really?" she asked, then grimaced at how inane she sounded. He chuckled and ran a finger down the curve of her cheek.

"Really," he confirmed. The smile faded from his face, replaced by an intent expression as he slowly ran his finger down her neck to trace her collarbones. She suppressed a shiver as his finger left behind tingles in its wake. "If it helps, I'm scared too," he admitted after clearing his throat, meeting her inquiring gaze squarely. "If…if we're on the same page about this," he continued, "I'm nervous because I'm not exactly sure what to do and that I might…um…hurt you."

 _Oh._

Elsa took his hand silently, the one he used to touch her cheek earlier, and pressed a kiss on his palm before placing it directly over her heartbeat. "Feel that?" she asked with a slight smile. "I'm not scared." Sure enough, once his lips had touched hers earlier, it was as if the storm inside of her calmed, replaced by a fierce desire to love him in every sense of the word.

Even if it hurts.

"But—"

"It may hurt," she continued. "But I don't care, as long as it's you."

Tadashi's face cleared, and he returned her smile, warm brown eyes crinkling. He stood up abruptly, causing her to emit a small squeal of surprise and wrapping her arms and legs around him. "I got you," he murmured, burying his face against her neck. "I'm not letting you go."

There were some awkward moments, even some laughter, when things went a bit awry. But he made good on his promise not to let her go all through the night.

As they lay in the dark, flushed and breathless, she dismissed the thought that things had gone rather fast between them. Months of suppressed longing for each other had finally bubbled to the surface—months of keeping a friendly façade for him, and a wall to keep him away for her, and they were helpless to hide their feelings anymore. Things were far from perfect between them, but Elsa knew that as long as she lived, what she had tonight with Tadashi was perfection.

And someday, she hoped that she would have the courage to say the words she longed to tell him.

 _I love you, Tadashi._


	2. Trust and Touch

Nothing but the sound of the keyboard going clickety-clack and the occasional soft crackle of welding filled the room. Normally, Elsa would have found the sounds her keyboard made helpful in keeping her focus while she did the programming for Baymax, but today Tadashi decided to start creating the robot's actuators. His welding and her typing made a strangely beautiful duet to her ears, but it was a new sound, which made it rather distracting too.

 _Maybe it's time for a break,_ she decided after hitting delete to get rid of a typo, pushing her glasses up her nose and tucking back the lock of hair that had fallen across her forehead behind her ears. She glanced at the small clock on her screen.

9:45 PM.

 _Fifteen minutes. Maybe I can still squeeze in—_

A loud groan interrupted her musings, prompting her to glance at her project partner. He had pushed back the protective mask from his face and was rubbing his left shoulder, rolling it around as well. Elsa watched him intently and heard him murmuring, as if he were talking to the almost-finished actuator he was working on. Her curiosity piqued, she placed her glasses on her desk and walked toward him, tapping his arm lightly to get his attention.

"Rough day?" she prompted, looking down at him with a slight smile. She gave him a quick, discreet once over, noting what he wore—a tight black t-shirt that molded to his body that if she looked hard enough, she would see the planes and contours of his chest and stomach.

Tadashi swiveled to face her, yanking the protective mask from his head and letting out a tired chuckle. "Yeah," he sighed. "I was just telling Baymax that I'm not giving up on him even if welding's a pain. Literally." He grimaced and rotated his shoulder again. "My back is killing me too."

"That's because you've been hunkered down all day," she chided him.

"Look who's talking. I can barely talk to you once you're plugged into your computer," he retorted, his arms snaking around her waist to pull her into a hug. Elsa stiffened at first, bracing her hands against his shoulders—it had only been a few days since they had officially become a couple, and while they're alone, there were still people outside the room and the door's unlocked and—

"Relax, Elsa. No one's going to walk in on us, if that's what you're worried about." Tadashi looked up at her, quirking an eyebrow as his thumbs traced lazy circles on her lower back. A shiver ran down her spine but the prospect of getting caught in a compromising position clashed with the pleasant sensation.

"How can you be sure? The door's not—"

*click*

"There. Door's locked." He smiled smugly and dangled a small remote before her. "Made it a few days ago—a universal remote for when I want to lock the door or bring down the blinds and I'm too lazy to get up. Didn't think it'll be this helpful, though."

"Ah." Elsa finally let herself relax, her hands creeping up his shoulders to run her fingers through his hair. "Though if you could do something about the blinds, maybe?" She motioned toward the large circular window. Doubtful as it was that anyone would see them, especially this late at night, she didn't want to take any chances.

Tadashi grunted and and complied, reaching behind him to point the remote at the blinds. Elsa watched the blinds go down, cutting them off from the rest of the world. And she preferred it that way.

"Better?" he asked, resting his head against her stomach.

"Much."

"Good. Please keep doing that, it feels nice."

"Playing with your hair?" Not that she was complaining. Now that she was free to touch him anytime and any way she wanted, she found that she loved running her fingers through his thick, black hair. It was such a liberating thought that someone loved her hands, her touch—things that in the past forced her to isolate herself. And now, she could scarcely believe that Tadashi placed his complete trust in her by letting her play with his hair. What if she accidentally froze his head? That's probably just as bad as freezing his heart. What if—?

"Elsa."

"Hmm?"

"Stop thinking."

She leveled a dry look at him, raising an eyebrow and setting her mouth into a firm line before answering. "Oh, so you're a mind-reader now, huh?" she challenged him, smirking.

"No," he laughed, and she felt her heart swell with happiness over the sound. But Tadashi's expression soon faded into a thoughtful, concerned look. "But I was holding you very closely, so I felt you tensing. Elsa," he stood up and cradled her jaw tenderly in his large, warm hands, "what's on your mind? Did something happen to you? You're not…afraid of me, are you?" He tilted his head, his brown eyes searching her blue ones intently, and she had to resist the urge to drop her gaze to avoid his scrutiny. A lifelong habit of closing herself off from people was a hard one to break.

"I'm not," she said neutrally. Truly, she wasn't. She felt safe with him.

Loved.

And it had been a very long time since she had ever felt that way.

But the thing is, she was still afraid of herself, of what she was capable of doing. Though Anna and Tadashi had shown her that love was the key to controlling her powers, completely breaking the fear that she had carried most of her life was proving to be impossible.

Then again, it's only been a few days since they admitted their feelings for each other.

It was right there she realized that the fear will always be within her, rearing its ugly head at the worst of times.

Like right now.

"Elsa? Please talk to me. Don't shut me out." Tadashi's soft, cajoling voice reached her ears, triggering long-buried memories of Anna saying the same thing by her door. Tears pricked her eyes, and she clenched her fists, trying so hard to keep control.

"Elsa?"

She almost jerked away from him, forcing down the "don't touch me" that she wanted to scream at him. But the bewildered look of confusion and hurt in Tadashi's eyes yanked her from falling into the familiar pit of despair. Elsa swallowed hard, taking a deep breath to clear her mind, to explain, to apologize for what she had almost done.

"I…I don't know where to start, Tadashi." She licked her lips nervously, stepping away from the comforting circle of his arms so she could pace back and forth to gather her thoughts. She flicked a glance at him—he mouthed "breathe" at her, raising his eyebrows to encourage her.

He really was a treasure. How could he be so patient with her after what she had almost done?

"You're right, I am afraid," she began. "But not of you. I never was and will never be afraid of you. But…" she trailed off, looking down at her hands, "I guess I'm still afraid of these. I thought I wasn't anymore, but…you know what these can be capable of. You've seen it for yourself." She raised her gaze back up to his, determined to lay everything out before him so he could decide if he still wanted her or not. The ball was in his court now.

Tadashi sobered. Perhaps he was reliving how she had lost control over her powers at her twenty-first birthday party back in Norway. How she had run away and froze the city, and how she had froze her sister's heart. He had been with her throughout it all, and when they got home, secrets and suppressed feelings had finally poured out.

Or so Elsa thought. Apparently, this one hadn't.

"You know I'm not afraid of you, right? I love you, and I'm not giving up on you. Besides me, there's Anna. She won't give up on you, either." Tadashi approached her slowly, giving her the space and the option to retreat.

But she didn't, because she was so tired of running. And so, when he finally stood before her, just inches away, she closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and pressed a kiss on top of her head. "I'm sorry," she mumbled against him, her arms limp against her sides.

Tadashi stepped back and grasped her wrists gently, bringing her hands up to his face. "I trust you, Elsa," he said, keeping her hands against his cheeks. He slowly brought them down over the strong column of his neck, down over his heart. She felt it beating steadily against her palm, and the heat of his skin seeped through the thin fabric of his black t-shirt. "I trust these hands too. You won't hurt me." He squeezed them as he said those words, his gaze fixed on hers steadily.

Elsa released the breath she held, committing every word he said to her memory. Trust. Of course she heard her parents and Anna say they loved her, but to hear someone say he trusted her was a novel experience. Of course she knew Anna trusted her too—it was part of the whole unconditional thing her sister was capable of—but the measures her father had taken to protect her and Anna from her powers that were spiraling out of control at that time caused the trust between her and her parents to crumble.

Her heart was too full to answer him with words, so she decided to show him instead.

She cradled his jaw with her hands—the hands he said he trusted—and pulled his head down to kiss him. Her lips were hesitant against his, but he let her take the lead. Her tongue traced the seam of his lips so she could coax his mouth open, and after some playful resistance, he welcomed her in. She plunged in almost greedily, loving how warm he was, and a part of her brain registered how her hands wandered all over his broad, well-muscled back, pulling his shirt from his pants so she could touch the warm skin underneath. His hands slid down her sides to settle around her waist to pull her closer against him then undid her braid, raking his hands through her hair.

For a few perfect minutes, they lost themselves in each other. But soon the need to breathe forced them apart. Elsa reluctantly broke apart from Tadashi, taking a deep breath as she opened her eyes. He was staring at her intensely, his eyes dark and sharp with want that she couldn't look away.

But then he blinked, and the spell was broken.

"I love you, Elsa," he declared quietly, reverently.

"Why, though? I don't get it, you could have had any girl and instead you chose me. I'm a mess."

"Heh. Because you've given away so much of your love, I figured I'd give some of mine to you."

This time, she raised a dubious eyebrow at him. "If you think you're being smooth, Hamada, you are seriously mistaken. That is so corny."

"Ah, but I know you—I bet you love it when I'm being corny." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively. "Come on, admit it."

"Fine. And I love you too, I guess."

Tadashi nodded approvingly. "That's what I want to—wait, what?" He gaped at her.

She made a show of glancing at her watch. "Oh, look at the time. We'd better go before we get locked up here or something."

"Elsa!"

She caught him off-guard again, pulling him down for another quick kiss. "Take me home, Tadashi? We could continue what we were doing," she suggested, lowering the pitch of her voice and twisting the corner of her lips into what she hoped was a naughty little grin. She never had a chance to flirt before and she hoped she didn't look foolish in her first attempt.

Her efforts were rewarded. "Well, come on then, let's go!" He grabbed her hand and started pulling her toward the door.

"Wait…wait! My stuff!"


	3. Cold Comfort Part 01

Elsa could count the people with whom she was free with her touches on one hand: Anna, Kristoff, Aunt Cass, Hiro, and of course, her boyfriend, Tadashi.

The idea that she had one still left her bewildered sometimes. She had resigned herself to being alone for the rest of her life, until he came along. Tripped into it, actually, considering how they first met by the cherry blossom-lined path at SFIT. She had not counted on falling in love and having it returned.

But Tadashi had changed that. He had breached the walls she had erected with his promise of friendship, and she had succumbed to his offer, giving into her need to make a connection with someone. Elsa had supposed the distance from Anna had weakened her resistance—San Fransokyo was so different from Arendelle that she almost felt like a normal person. There were very few things that reminded her of Anna and what had happened between them. Tadashi and his friends had changed her.

They got tipsy at Elsa's apartment tonight, with idle talk wandering over the subject of her powers, and he rambled on about creating special gloves for her that would control the flow of her powers as she fought crime as a masked vigilante.

"Think about it," Tadashi gushed, his brown eyes glittering with excitement. "You said that your powers are controlled by your emotions, right? And that if you feel too much, they get out of control. But what if I whip up a pair of gloves for you that would help control it? I mean, you can let it go, like, let the burn of righteous justice fuel your icy powers, and the gloves regulate the flow. Like a hose, or something." He grinned. "Cool idea, eh? And no pun intended." He paused and rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "You know, if we had more time, we could probably show it off at the SFIT Showcase."

Elsa fixed him with a deadpan stare, her mouth set in a line. "I think someone's been watching way too many superhero movies," she replied, raising a wry eyebrow as she took a sip of her wine. Her boyfriend shot her a sheepish grin and took a swig of his beer, setting the can on the nearby table. "Besides, my powers are a secret, remember? How can I be a superhero without blowing my cover?" she pointed out.

"Guilty as charged, and good point," he admitted. "Closet superhero fan, but don't tell Fred or I'll never hear the end of it. And uh..." he rubbed the back of his neck nervously, as if he realized he had said something wrong. "Look, I didn't mean to trivialize your powers—I mean, I know it's hard for you to control them, and—"

Elsa placed her own wineglass on the table silenced him with a finger over his lips. "I know you didn't mean anything bad, you dork," she admonished him with a playful grin. Tadashi blinked at her before lifting the corner of his mouth in a half smile, wrapping a hand around her wrist and kissing her finger.

"Dork, huh?" The look he gave her had her gulping in slightly nervous anticipation. Intimacy always left her torn between running away and reveling in the warmth of Tadashi's touch. Thirteen years of isolating herself had left such a mark on her. But it seemed he knew her better than she had expected, because he knew exactly when to back off or when to push her out of her comfort zone.

Tadashi pressed a kiss on her palm, the pulse point over her wrist (which had jumped the moment his lips touched her skin), before pulling her closer to pepper a trail of kisses up her neck to her jawline, punctuating it with one at the corner of her lips. He pulled away and gazed down at her expectantly, as if asking her if he should continue. Elsa's heart was pounding; her senses swam from the headiness of having him so close. She took a deep breath to gather her courage and straddled him, running her fingers through his thick black hair before cradling his face to kiss him. They lost themselves in each other for as long as their breaths would permit them, before pulling away.

Tadashi sighed and buried his face in the crook of her neck. "You're warm. Feels nice," he mumbled against her skin, his arms tightening around her. Elsa chuckled in response and kissed the top of his head.

"I've been told I give warm hugs."

"Mmm..."

"But Tadashi," she pulled away and adjusted her position to sit on his lap more comfortably. "About my powers—I'd rather just...you know, keep quiet about it. I mean, I know how to control it, more or less—"

"You do?" Tadashi asked, surprised.

"Love," she replied quietly. "You and Anna, Aunt Cass and Hiro, Kristoff and Sven, even Wasabi and the others. Family and friends. All of you help me control it." She paused, chewing on her bottom lip to deliberate if she should tell him the rest—because if she did, what if he changed his mind about them?

But the intent look in his eyes convinced her. "There are going to be days when I can't, though. And I've accepted it—that's enough for me," Elsa finished. She had promised herself that she wouldn't hide anything anymore. That if he really loved her, then he would accept her as she is—still healing from the past hurts she had endured and inflicted on Anna.

Tadashi was silent after her revelation. He coaxed her so that her head nestled on the curve of his neck and shoulder.

"I'm not giving up on you," he murmured to assure her. She hummed to acknowledge him and twined her fingers around his. A comfortable hush fell over them, each reveling in the other's presence.

"It's almost midnight," Tadashi said after a little while. "Time for me to go home."

"Do you have to go?" Elsa said with a mock pout, which made him chuckle.

"Yeah, unfortunately. Aunt Cass knows I'm with you, but ever since she found out about Hiro's bot-fighting, she's been keeping a closer eye on us." He started as if he remembered something. "Ah man, I almost forgot—I'm going to help Hiro with his thing for the SFIT Showcase tomorrow morning, so I really have to go."

Elsa reluctantly slid off his lap and stood up. "Well, tell him good luck from me, will you?"

"Yep." He followed suit and smiled down at her. "Drop by the house if you want—Hiro and I could always use a helping hand," he invited, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear.

She nodded, walking with him toward the door. "Take care going home." Tadashi bent down to kiss her goodbye before sauntering toward his scooter. From her doorway, she watched him put his helmet on and rev the engine. Shooting her one more look over his shoulder, he gave her a little salute before roaring off.

Being alone never usually bothered her, but she had to tamp down on the urge to run after him and ask him to stay the night. Elsa shook her head and went back inside, cleaning up to shake off the weird feeling of clinginess.

 _Woman up, Elsa,_ she told herself. _You're going to see him again tomorrow. And the day after that. And many more days after._

Her anxiety, always a beast lurking at the back of her mind, raised its head and began to prowl, causing her to squeeze her eyes shut to keep it away.

 _He's not going anywhere. Nothing is going to happen to him._

She glanced at the clock on the wall. Midnight—time to go to bed. But as she drifted off, an unwanted thought invaded her journey to slumber, causing her to open her eyes with a gasp.

 _Nothing is ever permanent. Remember your parents, and Anna. Fate's never been kind to you, why should it start being kind now?_

 _Stop it, stop it, stop it. Shut up!_ Elsa squeezed her eyes shut, willing the thought to go away. She sighed and flopped back on her back to stare at the ceiling.

 _I'm not giving up on you._ Tadashi's voice rang in her head, easing her worries a little.

 _That's right. I've got family and friends now. I'm not alone anymore. Well, metaphorically speaking, anyway._ Elsa smiled wryly and turned on her side. She glanced at the clock—1:15 AM. Arendelle is around eight hours ahead of San Fransokyo, so that meant Anna should be up and about around now. Knowing her sister though, she might still be snoring in bed.

After a few minutes of deliberation, she decided that Anna could use a wake-up call. She picked up her phone and dialed. A groggy voice picked up.

"Urrgh…hello?"

"Good morning, sleepyhead."

"Elsa? Why're you calling—isn't it midnight over there? Is everything okay?" Anna gabbled out, suddenly alert.

A pang of guilt went through her when she heard her sister's anxiousness. "Everything's fine," Elsa answered. "I just wanted to say hi, that's all."

There was about a ten seconds of silence on the other line before Anna spoke. "Seriously? You woke me up at the butt crack of dawn just to say hi?"

"It's 9:15 in the morning. I doubt it's the—as you've colorfully described it—butt crack of dawn."

Anna groaned. "You suck. I was having such a great dream, too."

"Nothing I can do about the time difference, Anna. What were you dreaming about?"

"Well…"

Talking with her sister was always a soothing balm to her anxieties, and she listened to Anna prattle on about her dream—something to do with her boyfriend Kristoff shirtless. "You know what the best part is? When his pants hang low and I can see the start of that v—"

"Whoa there, Anna—I think that's already TMI territory."

"Hey, you asked. Ooh, speaking of significant others…" her sister's voice took on a sly edge. "How're things going with Tadashi?"

Elsa frowned. "Uh…Good, I guess."

"Just that? Good?"

"W-well, what do you want me to say?" Elsa sputtered, her cheeks growing hot from embarrassment.

"Oh, I don't know—maybe something about how much of a good kisser he is? Or maybe how great he looks without his shirt on? Does he have abs? I bet he does—he's into karate, right?"

Elsa made a strangled little noise, trying to keep from blushing.

"I can hear you blushing, you know."

"Anna!"

* * *

It must have been the sunlight peeking through the blinds that woke her up. Elsa scrunched her face and yawned, shielding her eyes from the glare before opening them. For a moment she wondered where she was—the ceiling looked unfamiliar, too white and pristine compared to the cheerful yellow of her apartment. And why was she on the couch? Sleeping on it was highly uncomfortable—she felt something crack when she moved.

Reality came crashing down on her, which made her gasp and push herself up.

The fire.

Elsa remembered how shrill her voice sounded when she shrieked out Tadashi's name after the explosion. It had knocked her and Hiro off their feet, and she had almost charged into the inferno, easily shrugging Honey and Gogo off. It took Wasabi's bear hug to prevent her from doing so. The harsh sound of her breath and the crackling fire was all she heard before everything turned black for her.

She turned to look at the bed nearby, where the prone form of Tadashi lay. Ignoring her aching muscles and creaky joints, Elsa pulled a chair to sit beside him. Her eyes skimmed over him—he was heavily bandaged—the side of his neck, arm, and half his back had what Dr. Weiss described as partial-thickness burns. Elsa had been deeply shocked to fully comprehend the doctor's explanation, only that it was serious and might need skin grafting. It was most likely he had suffered some hearing loss too, considering the size of the blast and the ensuing inferno. He also had some cracked ribs, perhaps from having been buried underneath heavy rubble.

Bantering with Anna now seemed like such a faraway and surreal dream, but in reality it only happened last Saturday.

That had been five days ago.

Elsa didn't care how he survived. She had overheard some doctors discussing Tadashi's 'case' that an explosion of that magnitude should have killed him instantly. Something must have protected him, they speculated, because if there hadn't and he still survived, he would have been grotesquely disfigured, resembling something that had melted. He probably would have had his limbs blown off or requiring amputation, or completely deaf and blind, leaving him an invalid for the rest of his life.

 _Stop it!_ Elsa bent down and pressed her clenched fists against her temples, trying to block out the memory of the doctors' discussion. Out of morbid curiosity she had searched for pictures of burn victims, and she hadn't lasted two minutes before she felt sick to her stomach. She could feel the storm building up within her, scrabbling to be released. She heard the crackling frost forming around her hands, alerting her that she needed to leave—fast.

 _Don't feel. Don't. Feel._

A low, raspy moan reached her ears, yanking her from the brink of panic. Elsa's head snapped up to see Tadashi's heavy-lidded, glassy gaze trained on her. A nanogastric tube had been inserted through his nostril along with an oxygen mask covered his mouth and nose, which limited his speech. He tried to lift his right hand to touch her. Summoning a deep reserve of control and fortitude, she forced the storm and frost within her into submission and placed a gentle hand over his, shaking her head.

"Easy there, Tadashi," she soothed him, trying to keep her voice steady. "I'm sorry for worrying you. I'm alright, really."

His brows furrowed, cluing Elsa in that he might be having a hard time understanding her."Do you remember what happened?" His befuddled frown remained, his eyes searching hers urgently."There was an accident at the SFIT Showcase," she began with hesitation—was his state of mind stable enough for what happened to him? It had been traumatic for her, but it would definitely be moreso for him, who had experienced it firsthand. "An explosion. They're still trying to figure out how it happened."

"Callag...han?"

Elsa bit her lip, wondering if she should tell him now or later. "Like I said, take it easy," she said instead, brushing back his bangs from his forehead.

"Tell...me."

She capitulated with a sigh. "He died, Tadashi," she answered him quietly. His eyes widened and he began to sit up. "No, don't, just—it's not your fault, okay? It was a terrible fire and you did all you could. In fact—" Elsa stopped, feeling her eyes sting from tears that threatened to spill. Licking her lips and blinking the tears away, she continued. "It's a miracle you survived."

Elsa was starting to hate that word. Miracle. If anything, it only reminded her how she almost lost Tadashi in such a horrific manner.

He was starting to breathe quickly and warning beeps started to go off. "Tadashi—Taddie Bear, no, just, calm down, you're okay—"

He paid her no heed, his eyes darting about wildly as he tried to rise. "Somebody, help!" Elsa shouted, one hand trying to keep him down while her other scrambled for the emergency call button. A burly orderly appeared with a nurse in tow. He held Tadashi down while the nurse stuck some kind of liquid into his IV, which sedated him in a couple of minutes.

"Try not to say anything that would trigger the accident, Ms. Arendahl," the nurse advised after things had settled down. "Even if he asks, divert his attention. He's not out of the woods yet. His respiratory tract's badly damaged, so..." the nurse trailed off when she saw Elsa's tightly-clenched fists while maintaining a stoic front. "I'm sorry," she amended, laying a hand on her shoulder. "I'm telling you this because I know you want him to live. So please, try to keep his mind off what happened, okay?"

Elsa nodded stiffly. The nurse patted her shoulder and left, leaving her alone with Tadashi.

She needed to get out of here. She wanted to lock herself in her room and let the storm loose. But she can't—not right now, not when he needed her the most.

Elsa pulled up the chair she had been using earlier, which had toppled over during the ruckus. _My turn,_ she reflected as she laid a hand over his uninjured right, her thumb caressing the back. _I'm not giving up on you._


	4. Cold Comfort Part 02

"Hey, Hiro," Elsa greeted him, who was sprawled on the sofa playing with his handheld. "Is Tadashi home?"

Hiro snorted. "The jerk's upstairs," he huffed, barely sparing her a glance. "But if I were you, I'd stay away. He almost bit my head off earlier."

A concerned frown wrinkled her forehead. "Why? What happened?"

"I don't know," the boy answered, frustrated. "One minute I'm trying to snap him out of it—he's been in bed all day today. The next he's slapping my hand away telling me to leave him alone! So I did. Just left him up in our room." Hiro rolled his eyes. "If he keeps up this 'leave me alone crap'"—Hiro made quotation signs with his fingers—"I really will," he muttered darkly, going back to his game.

 _Oh no._ Elsa's heart sank. She knew it wasn't fair of her to expect so much from him, but she had hoped he wouldn't succumb to trauma. He seemed so strong and put together—before the accident he had been her rock whenever she doubted herself, and during the course of their relationship she noticed her lapses had lessened. About two weeks after the accident though, midnight calls to Anna became an everyday occurrence that her sister grew suspicious.

 _"Spill it, Elsa. What's wrong?" Elsa flinched at Anna's bluntness. A long habit of concealing was hard to break and she tried to fob her sister off with a weak 'what do you mean?'_

 _"What do you mean 'what do you mean'? I meant exactly what I asked you, Elsa. What's wrong?" Anna repeated the question with mild exasperation. "I can tell something's bothering you. You get this weird catch in your voice whenever you try to hide something from me."_

 _"How—?"_

 _"You're my sister. Sisters know these things, and I know you're trying to distract me," Anna interrupted, her tone softening. Defeated by her logic, Elsa told her what happened at the SFIT Showcase in fits and starts._

 _"I'm coming over, Elsa," Anna declared. "No buts. You need me right now."_

 _Elsa did not respond. She tightened her grip on her phone and raised a hand to her heart, her fingers curling into a loose fist as she closed her eyes. Anna became her anchor while Tadashi was at the hospital receiving treatment for his burns, and she had never been so thankful to have her for a sister._

She had felt cautious relief wash over her when three months passed by and nothing drastic had happened—Tadashi had been unsurprisingly subdued, but he slowly regained his cheer as he underwent skin grafting and physical therapy. Tadashi was in such excellent physical shape that he did not have a hard time with therapy as she dreaded. Still, Elsa's instincts had warned her that something might happen, pushing her to research about the psychological effects of burns. As it turned out, effects such as post traumatic stress disorder, depression, anxiety, or a combination of the three would not manifest until some months later, between three to six months, or in some cases, after a year. Elsa had braced herself for such a thing, and from what Hiro told her, it was starting to show.

Besides worrying about Tadashi, his ordeal triggered memories of her own parents, who had died in a plane crash somewhere in the Alps, which left her with recurring nightmares.

 _"Elsa. Elsa! Wake up, you're having a nightmare!" An urgent voice broke through her screams. Something shook her which jarred her back to consciousness. She blinked a few times, registering someone's death grip on her forearm and ice encrusting the walls of her room. "Wha—?" she said, her voice raw and befuddled. "What—? Anna? What's going on?"_

 _Her sister sighed and ran a hand through her snarled copper locks. "You were having a nightmare," she explained._

 _Elsa scrubbed her hands over her face, trying to keep the memory of the nightmare at bay. "I thought I was done with those," she muttered. She could feel Anna's gaze on her, but she stubbornly refused to meet it, keeping hers on her lap._

 _"Do you want to talk about it?" Anna asked after a few minutes, having moved to sit cross-legged beside her._

 _"I dreamed about Mama and Papa, and Tadashi," she began. "I can't...they were all at the SFIT Expo building. It was on fire, and they were shouting for me to rescue them. I tried to run to them, but I couldn't because ice formed over my feet, trapping me in place. I also tried to shoot flurries to stop the flames, but nothing came out—just this pathetic puff of air. Then..." she gulped hard, gathering the strength to continue. "Then this wall of fire just sprang up between me and them. It...it must have burned them away, because I heard them screaming. It was—oh, Anna," she buried her face on her sister's shoulder, willing the image away._

 _Anna enfolded her into a comforting embrace, making soft shushing sounds to help her calm down. "It was just a dream, Elsa," she murmured. "Just a dream. It can't hurt you, and I'm here, okay?"_

 _She was quiet for about a minute, letting Elsa cry it out. "This is serious," Anna said. "I think I'd better extend my stay here, if you're having such bad nightmares."_

 _Elsa raised her head and looked at Anna incredulously. "You can't miss school," she pointed out. "You've almost spent your entire school break here in San Fransokyo. We can't be both here for long—someone has to go back and keep tabs on things, now that Weaseltown's gone."_

 _"But—"_

 _"Go home, Anna," she insisted gently. "I can't because Tadashi needs me right now. With Weaseltown in prison we don't have an interim CEO for Nordfjellet. Kai will guide you in choosing the right one. And I'm not pushing you away or shutting you out, I'm being practical," she forestalled her sister. "Believe me, I want you to stay with me. I need you, Anna, but at some point I need to be strong on my own, too."_

 _Anna let out an irritated sigh. "I wish you'd quit being a martyr," she muttered. "You've been strong for so long, Elsa. Thirteen years—and what had that brought you? Nothing but a buttload of hurt," she argued._

 _"I know," Elsa replied ruefully. "But something tells me that whatever I've endured before will help me now. Tell you what—I promise to call you immediately if there are any problems, okay?"_

 _"If you're sure..."_

 _"I'm positive."_

Footsteps from the staircase brought her back to the present. "Sorry," Aunt Cass apologized as she grabbed Elsa in a hearty hug. "Customers—they're crazy. I've got an hour and a half for dinner break and then it's back to the madness." She pulled back and fussed over her, asking if she'd eaten dinner already.

"Not yet, Aunt Cass," Elsa replied, smiling. She knew the boys' aunt had come to look upon her as an adopted daughter. "Although I may be persuaded if you whipped up those spicy chicken wings that could...how did you put it? Melt my face off?"

"You're in luck, then, because that's exactly what we're having!"

"If that's what we're having, I'll pass," a flat voice cut through their conversation.

The three of them—Elsa, Hiro, and Aunt Cass—swiveled their heads toward the source of the voice. Tadashi. He stood by the stairs that led up to his and Hiro's room, looking like a wreck with his hair disheveled and two days' growth of stubble darkening his cheeks and chin. He wore a loose, long-sleeved T-shirt and baggy sweatpants which hid most of his burn scars, though a part of it crept up the left side of his neck and the underside of his jaw. Elsa noted that the progress of his healing skin grafts were going well, even though the affected area was still an alarmingly angry red.

Tadashi's jaw was clenched and his eyes were narrowed into glaring slits. Aunt Cass remained serene under his angry scrutiny. "That's too bad, Tadashi," she replied, heading toward the kitchen. "But I'll leave some for you in case you change your mind." She passed him by and patted his shoulder. Though he tried to hide it, Elsa saw he almost shook Aunt Cass's hand off.

Cloying awkwardness hung in the air before Hiro shot to his feet. "What the heck's your problem?" he demanded, getting up from the couch and stomping toward his brother. "Aunt Cass has been worried sick over you—"

Tadashi's mocking laughter cut him off. "That's rich, coming from you," he shot back. "Remember your bot-fighting days?"

"That's...that's different!"

"Sure, whatever you say, Hiro." Tadashi flicked a glance toward Elsa. She had watched the brothers as they argued, wishing she could say something that would ease the tension between them. Tadashi opened his mouth as if to say something to her, then closed it, staring at her as if daring her to say something. Elsa stood her ground and returned it with an unblinking one of her own.

 _Two can play at that game, Tadashi._

He sighed and dropped his gaze. "Stay for dinner if you want, Elsa," he said, turning away to head downstairs as she and Hiro watched. A minute passed before one of them spoke.

Hiro threw up his hands. "Argh, what is his problem?" he fumed, pacing back and forth a few times before facing her. "Why is he being a jerk, Elsa?" He looked up at her, pain and confusion in his brown eyes. His tone changed from furious to plaintive, sounding like Anna, back when she pleaded for Elsa to come out of her room and build a snowman.

Elsa bit her lip and sat down on the couch. "Come here," she invited him, patting the space beside her. Hiro complied and leaned against the backrest as he looked at her expectantly. She swallowed back her slight nervousness—though she had depression and anxiety, she was no expert, and she could only guess what Tadashi grappled with. He never opened up to her, and she didn't press the issue, thinking she might make things worse. _I should have reached out to him,_ she realized with regret. _I should have—_

"Elsa?" Hiro prompted.

"Sorry. I was...um, anyway." Elsa paused and blinked a few times, organizing her thoughts. "I don't know what his problem is, exactly. I've never talked to him about it," she admitted, ashamed. "I should have, but I didn't want to force him. I don't...I'm not good with talking to people."

Hiro didn't answer—just looked and nodded encouragingly for her to continue.

"Anyway, your brother survived a horrible accident, had serious injuries, and lost his mentor. That's a lot to deal with, so I'm not surprised he's shutting us out. He doesn't want to talk about what he's been through because it'll just remind him of what happened," Elsa said. "So please be patient with him. If you can, suggest that he seek professional help. And Hiro—" she placed both hands on his shoulders to emphasize the importance of her next words—"don't give up on him, alright? If he lashes out at you, let it go. Promise me that." Her grip on his shoulders tightened unconsciously, causing him to start and blink before his expression hardened into one of determination.

"Yeah, you can count on me," he agreed. "Guess it's payback time for me, huh?"

"Payback?" Elsa echoed.

"Uh-huh. Tadashi's always been there for me. It's my turn now."

Elsa smiled at Hiro. "You're a good brother. Anyway..." she trailed off at the muffled thump downstairs. "What on earth...?"

A louder thump followed, then a crash. "That sounded like it came from the garage," Hiro remarked, worried. They started when they heard a scream of agonized frustration, followed by the sound glass breaking. "C'mon, Elsa! He's probably going nuts down there!"

Both of them dashed down the stairs and toward the garage to find Tadashi sweeping an arm over one of the tables, sending test tubes, flasks, and chemistry equipment flying before he upended it. Some kind of machine—Elsa surmised it was an old project of his—lay in broken pieces on the floor. Elsa and Hiro gaped at the damage Tadashi wrought upon the garage before she came out of her confusion.

"What are you doing?" she exclaimed, ducking as he chucked a wrench toward her and Hiro. "Dammit Tadashi! You're going to hurt someone!"

He didn't appear to hear her, moving on to a drafting desk, where some sketches and blueprints were clipped on. "Tadashi, no!" Elsa gasped when he started tearing them up.

"What's going on in here?" Aunt Cass appeared, stopping short with her jaw dropping when she saw the damage her nephew had done. "Tadashi, oh my God—stop it!"

The expression on Tadashi's face was chilling—his normally open and cheerful expression was replaced with a twisted mask of fury as he trashed machinery and equipment.

Elsa took a deep breath to fortify herself then and dashed toward him when she saw an opening, ducking from his flailing arms. She pulled her arm back and slapped him. Hard.

"Tadashi! Get ahold of yourself!" she screamed into his face, grabbing his shoulders and shaking him with enough force to make his head whip back and forth. Her palm stung, and out of her peripheral vision she saw Aunt Cass rub her hands over her arms and Hiro's breath hanging in the air—her control over her powers was slipping. But who could blame her? She was in the middle of a highly-charged situation, with her boyfriend on a trauma-fuelled rampage.

He stopped, his chest heaving from exertion, but his eyes remained shuttered, telling Elsa that his mind was still trapped somewhere. Elsa scanned his face anxiously, searching for something—anything—that would give her an idea what went on in his mind. He was mouthing something that Elsa strained to understand.

 _The fire...too...hot?_ she wondered, furrowing her brow. His lips were moving too fast for her to be completely sure, but it made sense. Tadashi was a burn victim—of course he'll be wary of anything that reminded him of what happened.

… _the chicken wings_. _Oh, Tadashi._

Elsa summoned all her willpower to keep herself together at her realization. Tadashi now feared heat—probably even warmth, which was probably the reason for his behavior toward Hiro earlier. He can't stand being touched, just like she had before. She kept people away because of her powers, because besides being afraid to hurt anyone, who liked being touched by someone whose skin turns ice-cold when she loses control?

The answer suddenly clicked into place. _Cold...of course!_ Hope surged through her as she centered herself, channeling the ice within her to converge in her hands. Instinct told her that her palms were cool to the touch. Taking a deep breath and praying for her crazy idea to work, she placed her hands on Tadashi's face, concentrating so that the cold was bracing enough to snap him out of whatever that held him in its grip.

"Tadashi, look at me, please," she implored him. "Please come back to me. Don't let the fear get to you. We're here, we'll help you. We won't give up on you, do you understand? People need you—Hiro, Aunt Cass, those who need Baymax's care." Elsa licked her lips, her mind working furiously to think of the right words to say. "I need you," she whispered, hating how selfish she was being, but it was the truth. "I need you because I love you. You helped me when I needed it the most, and I want to repay you. But I can't do that if you won't come back to us. So please…" Elsa trailed off, sobbing brokenly now as her hands slid from his face and her knees buckled. She wrapped her arms around his neck to hug him and keep herself upright—he stood stiffly, his gaze still distant and unseeing.

At the back of her mind Elsa registered that this was eerily similar to the time her powers had killed Anna by turning her into a statue of ice. Bitter resentment and anger bubbled up, threatening to choke her—this was the second time her powers had failed.

 _I don't have powers. I have a curse._

She didn't know how long she clung to him as she sobbed—perhaps only a minute or two. But it was the longest minute she had ever endured.

"Don't cry." A calloused thumb brushed her tears away. "I can't stand to see you cry."

Elsa raised her head to see Tadashi looking down at her, bemusement etched on his features. "Tadashi," she breathed, relief flooding through her.

He blinked twice before surveying the damage around him. "I…did this?" he wondered with disbelief.

"Yeah," Hiro spoke up for the first time. Elsa turned and saw Aunt Cass's pale countenance and Hiro's poker face.

"I…I'm sorry," Tadashi gasped, mortified. "I didn't—I was—oh God." He jerked away from Elsa's hold, breathing hard before sinking to his knees, bowing his head to hide his shame. "I'm sorry," he kept whispering, fists clenched on his lap. "I'm sorry for almost breaking my promise to you, Tousan."

Elsa shot Aunt Cass a questioning glance to ask what Tadashi meant. The older woman's expression was troubled. "I'll tell you later," she mouthed. Elsa nodded and knelt down at Tadashi's side to his level, wrapping an arm around his quaking shoulders.

"Are you okay?" she asked, wincing as soon as she did. What an inane question—of course he wasn't. She didn't wait for him to answer, cradling his head against her chest and stroking his hair to soothe him, keeping her skin cool to avoid setting him off again.

Her ministrations had the desired effect. Tension slowly flowed out of him, and he relaxed against her hold. "I'm alright now, Elsa," he said quietly after a few minutes, pushing away from her. But he still wouldn't look at her. Shame remained written over his features, which Elsa recognized as the aftermath of an episode. Rather than pointing it out, she stood up and held out a hand to him.

"Good," she replied simply. "Come on. We'll clean this up later. Right now, I think you need to rest." Tadashi gaped at her proffered hand before looking up at her uncertainly. Patience was the key here—Elsa resisted the urge to grab his hand and pull him up. He soon placed his hand over hers, and she grasped it firmly to haul him to his feet.

Regret tinged his tone. "I almost hurt you."

"Don't beat yourself up over it. I've been there," she reassured him, even though she knew that words alone were not enough.

"But—"

Elsa placed a finger over his lips to silence him. "Just don't. Trust me. It won't do you any good." She stroked his cheek, which was still red from her earlier slap. "Besides, I did hurt you. How's your cheek?"

Tadashi regarded her solemnly. "You've got quite an arm," he remarked, keeping her hand on his cheek with his. "Your skin feels cool. It's nice."

 _What a turnaround,_ Elsa mused, thinking about the time he had sighed against her neck and told her that her skin felt nice because it was warm. She was glad that her powers had helped someone for a change, but…

 _This can't go on forever,_ she thought as she walked back into the house with Tadashi, an arm around his waist. _He'll have to face whatever's bothering him one day._

 _I'll be there for him when that day comes._


	5. Cold Comfort Part 03

"I suppose you might be wondering what Tadashi meant earlier," Aunt Cass remarked as she wiped the café's counter with a white rag. She kept her eyes on the surface, a small frown marring her forehead while she focused on the spot she was cleaning. Elsa and Hiro sat at a nearby table and waited—her hands were neatly folded on her lap and her back ramrod straight with tension, while he slouched and rested his elbows on the table, his forearms crossed.

Aunt Cass put the rag away then disappeared to the back. Elsa heard the faint sound of water running for about a minute or two before the older woman reappeared, wiping her hands on her pants. "Do you guys want coffee? Hot chocolate? Donuts?" she offered, raising her eyebrows.

"Come on, Aunt Cass—what did Tadashi mean earlier when he said he was sorry?" Hiro pressed.

Aunt Cass sighed and fiddled with her necklace, the movement catching Elsa's eye. It was a green pendant—an emerald?—suspended on a silver chain. She didn't answer Hiro immediately, her eyes roving back and forth in thought. She sat down beside her nephew and began to speak after a minute of thoughtful silence.

"You know your mom and I are twins, right?" she said softly. "Only difference between us were our eyes—she had blue ones. We had matching necklaces, with a sapphire and emerald pendant. She had the emerald one. I had the sapphire one and exchanged our necklaces when she died."

"Oh," Hiro murmured, his eyes widening fractionally over the revelation.

"Tadashi had mentioned his parents died in a car accident," Elsa ventured, her voice soft. "That's about all I know."

"He never liked talking about it," Aunt Cass replied after a heavy pause, shaking her head. "Who can blame him? It wasn't something a boy should go through. Alex and Akihiko died when he was eleven, and you—" at this she glanced at Hiro—"were three." She let out a short, breathy laugh. "My sister's name was Alexandra," she explained when she caught Elsa's curious gaze. Elsa knew the brothers' father was named Akihiko, but she never learned their mother's name until now. "She was the older one by five minutes. We went by Lexie and Cassie when we were kids then Alex and Cass as we got older because our names both had 'sandra' in it. My parents thought they were being clever." She rolled her eyes and gave a wobbly smile. "Anyway, sorry—I was getting caught up in the memories. I miss Alex. She—she was my best friend."

Elsa felt a pang of sympathy for her, offering the older woman an understanding smile. "I know what you mean, Aunt Cass," she said, nodding. "My sister Anna, she's my best friend, too."

"Siblings share a special bond, especially twins," Aunt Cass agreed, misty-eyed, before she gasped and grabbed Hiro's shoulder. "Wait a second—what date is it today?"

"Um, it's the fourteenth," he answered with a mystified expression on his face. "Why?"

Aunt Cass sent him a pointed look until the answer dawned on him. "Oh. Yeah, that's probably why Tadashi went berserk earlier."

"Am I missing something here?" Elsa asked, shooting a glance between aunt and nephew.

"Tomorrow's the day our parents died—we usually go to our parents' graves to clean it up and stuff," a somber Hiro answered her. "Fun, huh?"

"Your brother idolized your father," Aunt Cass remarked, remembrance written on her face. "Tadashi had said he wanted to be a doctor like Akihiko back then. I was surprised when he applied for an SFIT scholarship—he wouldn't tell me why he suddenly wanted to go there, only saying it's a good school."

"Probably for some self-sacrificing reason. Like, I bet it was because SFIT's cheaper since it's only fifteen minutes away from here. And he probably wanted to keep an eye on me," Hiro guessed. "You know how he is."

Aunt Cass raised an eyebrow at her nephew. "Which is why you should appreciate your brother more," she admonished him. "He's made a lot of sacrifices for you, like the time he rescued you from the bot-fighting bookies. Or like your room—he's got that little corner while you have all that space for your doohickeys," she pointed out. "The least you could do is to listen to him."

"Hey, I DO listen to him, Aunt Cass! Sometimes," he protested before shrinking under his aunt's gimlet stare.

Elsa cleared her throat to bring the discussion back on topic. "Aunt Cass?" she prompted politely, raising her eyebrows.

"Right, right…so I pulled Tadashi from his classes that day, and we rushed to the hospital. Alex was...dead on arrival. Akihiko was barely holding on, like he was waiting for Tadashi. Mom and Dad—your Grandmammy and Grandpappy—were babysitting you that day, Hiro. Your parents were supposed to attend this doctor's luncheon at some fancy hotel when the accident happened." She stopped and blinked rapidly, biting her lip. "A truck lost control and caused a seven-car pileup on the freeway."

Elsa swallowed, thinking about her own parents. Before she could dwell on the thought more, Aunt Cass continued with her story.

"Akihiko made Tadashi promise to take care of you, Hiro. To be your role model and protector, since he can't. Your father went into cardiac arrest right after Tadashi agreed." Aunt Cass closed her eyes and released a slow breath. "I can remember it so clearly—Akihiko whispering to Tadashi that he needed to grow up, and that he was sorry for placing the burden on him, but he had no choice—he was a doctor, he knew he wasn't going to make it. I also heard him say to Tadashi that he regretted leaving you, Hiro. Then that sound—the sound of Akihiko flatlining…"

Elsa listened to the rest of the story, unable to keep her heart from hurting for Tadashi. As Aunt Cass described what happened next, she could see in her mind's eye how they were ushered to the hospital's lobby by a nurse before the defibrillator was wheeled in followed by a harried doctor, with him casting his last look at his father over his shoulder. How he must have clenched his jaw to maintain a calm façade as his tears dried on his cheeks while he and Aunt Cass waited anxiously at the lobby. How his aunt's hands dug into his shoulders as they spotted the doctor walking toward them, hope fluttering in his chest before it was dashed into a million pieces at the words "I'm sorry, ma'am. He's gone."

A boy should never carry a man's burden on his young shoulders, but Tadashi had done so right at that moment, when he had taken a deep breath and uttered a composed "Thank you for letting us know, Doctor."

"Tadashi never told me that," Hiro said, yanking Elsa out of her brooding. He looked a bit dazed over what Aunt Cass told them. "Then again, I...never really thought of asking." Guilt caused his shoulders to sag as he bit his lip, compelling Elsa to reach out and place a reassuring hand on his forearm. He glanced up at her touch and she shook her head.

"Don't beat yourself up over it," she consoled him. "At least now you understand your brother better, right?"

Hiro nodded after a moment. "Thanks, Elsa," he answered with a slight smile.

Silence blanketed the three, each preoccupied with their thoughts. Besides Aunt Cass's story explaining Tadashi's behavior earlier, Elsa mused on how their fathers and younger siblings had such a profound impact on them at such a young age, shaping who they are. _That explains why I was so drawn to him,_ she mused, resting her chin on her interlaced fingers. _He made me feel safe and loved, because that's how he had been with Hiro. What about me, though? What can I offer him? Growing up with 'conceal, don't feel' screwed me up big time...I'm still surprised he puts up with me and my...problem._

A half-formed idea sparked in her brain, but Aunt Cass's voice broke through her musings before she could fully examine it.

"Elsa?"

She jerked her head up to see Aunt Cass regarding her with concern. "Are you alright, honey?"

"I—yes. Aunt Cass?"

"Hmm?"

"Would you mind if...if I spent the night here?" Elsa blurted out. "I mean, I want to watch over Tadashi tonight. If that's okay—er, well, I won't be in his room, I could just sleep on the couch. Or something," she stammered with a sheepish smile. Heat began creeping up her neck when Aunt Cass and Hiro glanced at each other. It was a half-baked idea, and she was surprised at how she jumped at the impulse—it was the kind of thing Anna did, not her. "Actually, you know what, forget I asked, it was totally inappropriate," she babbled, waving a hand.

"Oh, you're fine," Aunt Cass dismissed. "I'm glad you offered. Tadashi's been having trouble sleeping, hasn't he, Hiro?"

"Yeah," Hiro agreed. "Take my bed, I'll take the couch. That way it'll be easier for you to keep an eye on Tadashi."

"But—"

"I'd better go clean up. It's a bit of a mess," Hiro apologized as he jumped to his feet and scampered back inside the house.

"And I'll get you some change of clothes. Don't worry." Aunt Cass cast a measuring look over her. "I've got some extra underwear somewhere around here. Never got to wear them because of hips like these." She sighed.

"Really, it's no trouble, I could go back to my place and—"

"No buts, I'm not about to let you off at this time of the night, Elsa," Aunt Cass countered, raising and wagging a finger at her. "Come on."

Elsa felt an awkward grin stretch across her face. Aunt Cass can be such a force of nature when she put her mind to it, pretty much like Anna. _I am such a pushover when it comes to those two,_ she grumbled inwardly, following the older woman into the house like an obedient puppy.

About an hour later, fresh from a shower and wearing a pair of borrowed sweatpants and t-shirt, Elsa stood beside the sleeping Tadashi, watching how his eyes moved behind his closed lids. _I wonder what he's dreaming about? Please let it be something good,_ she prayed, lowering herself carefully on his bed so as not to wake him. Tadashi grunted, scowling and clenching his jaw, which prompted her to run a soothing finger between his creased brows and to brush the slightly damp bangs from his forehead. He gradually relaxed under her gentle touch, sighing as he rolled over on his side toward her.

Satisfied, Elsa moved to stand up, but stopped short when Tadashi grabbed her forearm and murmured something. Glancing back down at him in surprise—she thought he was asleep—she bent down to try to catch what he said.

"Don't leave me." He looked at her through heavy-lidded eyes, which still managed to convey his need for her.

Elsa swallowed and bit her lip. "I won't," she whispered before she pressed a soft kiss on his forehead. "I will be right here."

* * *

The sensation of warm, stroking fingers on her back and the tickle of hair under her chin woke her up. Other sensations soon followed—the rasp of cotton against skin, a heavy arm draped over her waist, and legs tangled with hers. Cracking an eye open, she moved her head to see Tadashi awake, scrutinizing her with a grave stare. She waited for him to speak—he was usually the one who initiated conversation between them, but he didn't.

Elsa supposed the tables were turned now.

"Hey," she whispered, and then thought it was kind of absurd because it was just the two of them in the room. Hiro, true to his promise, had slept on the couch downstairs. Then again, perhaps the stillness of the night was best suited for soft words and meaningful touches.

She wished she had started the conversation with something better than an inane 'hey', though.

"You okay?" she asked, cradling his jaw with her right hand and stroking his cheekbone with her thumb. Tadashi snorted, his mouth twisting into a grimace.

"I must have left a huge mess," he muttered.

"Wish I could say it's nothing bad, but I have no idea what was in your garage."

"Just a bunch of old projects Hiro and I had been working on. They're all abandoned, but...yeah, still a mess."

"Messes can be cleaned up." She hoped he didn't miss what he meant.

"Can they?" There was a faint note of bitterness and regret in his voice.

"Yes." Elsa was decisive and strong in her declaration, a rarity for her. She shifted so that she could look directly into his eyes. "You taught me that, you know."

"I'm not a neat freak. You are," he countered, a teasing light flaring briefly in his eyes. She set her mouth in a straight line and raised an eyebrow at him.

"Yes. Yes, I am," she deadpanned. "You're a smart guy, Tadashi. I hope you understood what I meant."

"I did, yeah."

They fell quiet, each lost in thought for a few minutes before Elsa initiated conversation once more. "Aunt Cass told me what happened when your parents died," she ventured with caution. She didn't know if it was too soon to broach such a topic, but instinct told her it was now or never.

Tadashi sighed and sat up, hunching and rubbing a hand over his upper left arm, where the worst of the burns were. "I almost died," he stated in a monotone. "I almost broke my promise to my father to take care and watch over Hiro. And I almost hurt you."

Her eyebrows rose over his declaration. "Hurt me? What do you mean?" she asked, sitting up as well.

"If I died, I would have. You've gone through so much, Elsa. I can't bear adding to that."

A sharp pain lanced through her chest over the thought of losing him. "I…" She closed her eyes to center herself and decided to speak from her heart. "But you didn't," Elsa began, laying a hand on his shoulder. "You're still here. And…I know this is easier said than done—believe me, I know—but the only thing you can do now is move forward. The past is in the past, let it go, or so the song goes." Tadashi glanced at her with a slight smile at her weak joke before he looked down to avoid her gaze.

"I can't stand looking in the mirror sometimes," he confessed with a hushed voice. "It just…these scars remind me of my mistake."

Elsa tucked a lock of hair behind her ear and searched her mind for the right things to say. "What you did was not a mistake," she countered him firmly. "You did the right thing, and it was a very brave thing to do. But I'm not going to lie—there are going to be bad days, Tadashi. There are going to be times when the smallest thing would remind you of the worst things," she stated, her voice faraway with remembrance. She felt the unwelcome yet familiar tightness in her throat when the memory of hurting Anna with her powers got dredged up. Through the feeble light cast by the moon, Elsa could see the scars that crept up his neck. She knew the extent of his burns—they covered most of his left arm, the left side of his back, and part of his neck, but she hasn't seen them up close. "May I see them? Your scars—I mean, if it's okay," she probed, cautious.

Tadashi didn't move for a long time that Elsa began to worry. Just as she opened her mouth to take back what she asked, he yanked his sweatshirt off, revealing the red, healing skin grafts. She reached her hand out tentatively, pulling it back for a moment. "Does it still hurt?" she asked.

"Sometimes. It's numb most of the time, though. The doctor said it'll be months before I feel anything besides pain." He nodded. "You can touch it. If you want to."

She furrowed her brow and concentrated, letting the ice flow down her arm to gather into her palms. _Not too much,_ she told herself. _Steady…there._ Taking a breath to calm her nervous heart, she moved behind him and her hand on his upper arm, noting how he flinched and stiffened under her touch. "It's okay," she murmured, letting her palm drift over to his upper back, the heat of his skin warring with the coolness of hers.

"Physical therapy was tough," Tadashi muttered. "Had to do stretches and range of motion exercises so the scars wouldn't limit my movement. The splints—they were the worst. Couldn't move much. I was trapped again. I hated it."

 _I was wrong. What he went through was so much worse compared to what I did._ Elsa leaned her forehead against the smooth, unmarred part of his back, her cool palm still resting over the scars. Her other arm wound itself around his chest, hand over his heart, which beat steady and strong underneath her fingers

"I will be right here. I'm not giving up on you," she promised him, her voice brimming with quiet intensity. She felt him shift—raising her head, she found him looking at her over his shoulder.

"Thank you," he whispered, squeezing her hand that lay over his heart with his good one. "I love you."

Elsa kissed his back before she responded. "I love you, too."

* * *

"Alright you two, rise and shine, I've made a nice breakfast of bacon, French toast, and eggs!" Aunt Cass chirped as she reached the top of the stairs that led to Tadashi and Hiro's room. She stopped short. "What—where's Elsa?" she wondered, seeing how Hiro's bed seemed untouched. Walking over to the divider, she slid it open to find her spooned up against Tadashi protectively, her arm sticking out over her head as the other one was wrapped around his chest. Aunt Cass noticed how Tadashi clutched at her hand, keeping it against his heart.

"Huh. Guess it'll have to be brunch, then," she remarked, closing the divider as quietly as she could. She wondered if she could close the café for the day—would be a good time for them to just relax and spend the day together.

The mess from last night can wait.


	6. Empty Nest

_Note:_

This is loosely related to blunaowl's The Pout and Snowboarding fics, both of which can be read on Tumblr. I strongly suggest you read them first before this one. blunaowl owns Haruki (Tadashi and Elsa's son) and his sister.

* * *

"Looks like we're all packed and ready to go, Ma," Haruki commented, arms across his chest. He raised an eyebrow and glanced up, appearing to be recounting something, his lips moving without a sound. The pale morning light cast a halo around him as he stood by the doorway of their house. He was the spitting image of his father, except for one glaring difference—he had her striking blue eyes, which caused many girls' hearts go pitter-patter when he looked at them, especially when he turned on the charm. He also had a bit of Hiro in him, with how he left his shaggy hair artfully mussed. Elsa felt a mix of trepidation, pride, and excitement as she regarded her tall, handsome, black-haired son.

Trepidation, because both her children are now grown enough to go off on their own. Pride, because she knew she raised them well and they would conduct themselves accordingly. Excitement, because while she loved them fiercely, she looked forward to having her husband and the house all to herself.

Elsa shot a fond glance at him, who was roughhousing with Haruki, just like he did when their son was only a boy. He had softened in the middle a bit, but his shoulders remained broad and steady as ever. She always felt a little thrill when she ran her hands over those shoulders. There was also some silver along his temples, crow's feet at the corner of his eyes, and lines bracketing the sides of his mouth, which gave him a dashing, dignified air.

 _For a dork,_ she mused, laughing quietly behind her hand, watching her husband trap Haruki in a playful headlock and mussing his hair.

"Haruki, let's go!" a female voice yelled from outside. "Time's up for all that male bonding, you two!"

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," he hollered back, turning his head toward the source of the voice. Haruki sighed and made a face. "The slave driver beckons. See you both on Thanksgiving," he said, opening his arms to embrace his parents.

"Ah, give your sister a break," Tadashi remarked after his son let him and Elsa go. "She's excited."

Haruki snorted and rolled his eyes. "Ha. We'll see if she's still excited after pulling an all-nighter to pass three ten-page essays, and that's just the beginning," he scoffed. "Well, bye then!" He gave them both a cheeky salute, a small grin crossing his face as he walked backward toward his car where his sister waited. Tadashi and Elsa followed their son to his car, watching as he got in and tapped their daughter's arm. He beckoned with his head toward their parents, prompting her to smile sheepishly and wave goodbye at them. "See you in a few months, you guys!" she bellowed over the sound of the car starting, which made her brother wince.

A few minutes later, they were off. The Hamadas watched Haruki drive down San Fransokyo's rolling streets, staying by the curb until his car disappeared around the corner. "They're gone," Elsa said, sliding an arm around Tadashi's waist. She felt the sudden onslaught of tears sting her eyes, but she blinked them away, also resisting the urge to bury her face in her husband's chest.

Tadashi sighed and wrapped an arm around her shoulders to press a kiss on her temple. "Let's get back inside," he suggested.

Before Elsa could step foot inside their house, Tadashi suddenly swept her off her feet to carry her in his arms like a bride. "What are you doing?" she gasped after emitting a squeal of surprise. He only shrugged, grinning at her unrepentantly.

"Just felt like it. The kids are gone, it's just the two of us, so…" he trailed off, wiggling his eyebrows. Feeling mischievous herself, Elsa decided to play dumb by scrunching hers in confusion.

"Uh…?"

By then they were already inside, with Elsa having helped Tadashi open the door when he fumbled for it with her in his arms. She had earned herself a kiss on the tip of her nose for doing so.

Tadashi put her down and winced. "That's probably the last time I'll pull that stunt," he said, placing his hands on his lower back. "I'm getting old for that sort of thing."

Elsa pinned him with a flat stare. "I hope you're not implying I had gained weight," she deadpanned, raising an eyebrow.

"You know full well you could eat a mountain of chocolates and not gain a pound," he retorted. "Fast metabolism, as you'd pointed out to me when we started dating." His amusement faded and was gradually replaced by gravity, his eyes roving over her face before letting his intent gaze wander down her body. A slow blush started creeping across the bridge of her nose at his scrutiny.

"What?" she asked with a hint self-consciousness. It was silly how she was blushing like a newlywed now—she was certainly no stranger to intimacy, considering how her husband had sent her scorching looks over the heads of their oblivious children through the years, especially when they were younger. She knew age and worries had carved some slight wrinkles on her forehead and that her body had stretch marks from giving birth to her children. She allowed herself a bit of pride that she had mostly retained her lithe figure even though her hips had thickened a little. But there was something different about the way he stared at her—yes, there was a mixture of love and lust in those brown orbs, but something else glimmered within them. Something that took her a moment to figure out as she returned his stare.

Awe.

"W-why are you looking at me like that?" she asked, nervous and curious.

"You're beautiful as the day I first saw you," he murmured, tracing a finger down the curve of her cheek then reaching up to release her luxurious blonde hair from its neat bun. Its light color hid the strands of silver that she was starting find more often these days. "You know, I had fantasized about doing this to your braid when I got home that day."

"On your twenty-first birthday."

"Mmm-hmm."

"You certainly don't waste any time," she teased him. "The kids haven't been gone ten minutes."

"What can I say? I'm a morning person."

Tadashi backed her against the closed front door, his hands on her hips. She gave a little start when he squeezed them before he ran his hands up her back slowly. She hadn't even noticed how he had bent closer to her until she felt his warm breath as his mouth hovered over hers, asking for her permission.

Deciding to close the distance between them, she yanked him toward her by the collar for an open-mouthed kiss. Twenty-plus years of marriage had not dimmed the passion between them—though buffeted by the winds of change, it burned more brightly. The greatest challenge they had faced was Haruki's snowboarding accident some years ago—the boy had inherited her love for the sport, and perhaps her bad luck too. He had crashed into a tree just as she had during her youth, bringing back painful memories and nightmares that she thought she had banished.

 _Tadashi found her sitting beside Haruki, a haunted look in her eyes as she stared at their son, who was hooked up on several machines to keep him alive while he recovered from his injuries. The bright white light made him look paler, younger, and more vulnerable. Hard to believe that yesterday he was whooping with joy as he raced down the slope on his snowboard._

 _He clenched his fists at how helpless he felt. It was painful to see Haruki injured so badly, but he could clearly see his wife had it far worse. Elsa was very good at hiding her emotions, but over the years he had catalogued many of his wife's quirks and habits and it was plain to see how hard she was taking it, the similarities between Haruki's present and her past. He sighed and pulled up a chair to sit in front of her. "Don't blame yourself over this," he began, wishing he had better words to say. "Haruki…he's strong. He'll pull through, I'm sure."_

 _"How do you know?" she asked hollowly. "This is exactly what happened to me. What if he—"_

 _"Don't go there," Tadashi cut her off. He hated how harsh he sounded, but he had to stop her before she spiraled down toward despair. "What happened to you isn't going to happen to him, because we're here. We're not…going to leave him. And if the worst happens—" at this he shot a meaningful look at Elsa, whose eyes widened—"we'll know what to do. This was an accident, Elsa. He's been taught by the best, but there are some things beyond one's control. He will not go through what you had. I promise you that," he vowed._

 _Elsa bent her head down and was silent for a long time. At a loss on what to do next, he reached out and placed a hand over hers, which were clasped tightly over her lap. Her stoic expression crumbled at his touch. Tears flowed freely down her cheeks and on to their joined hands._

 _"I just want him back, Tadashi," she whispered. Minutes ticked by, punctuated by the soft tick tock of the wall clock, before a groggy voice reached their ears._

 _"Ma…?"_

Tadashi gave her bottom lip a gentle nip before tapering the kiss off. "You're distracted," he noted, resting his forehead against hers.

She didn't know how to put what she felt in words. She owed the man before her so much—he had given her love, laughter, and loyalty. Loyalty—that's what his name meant. _Fits him to a T,_ Elsa mused, chuckling.

"What's so funny?" he murmured as his hands crept under her shirt, splaying them over her waist. She closed her eyes to savor the warm radiating from his palms as she slid her hands up his neck to toy with the ends of his hair at his nape.

"Nothing."

"If you're not going to tell me I may have to distract you from your distraction," he mock threatened. Elsa smirked.

"Make me," she challenged him, a corner of her mouth lifting up in a mischievous grin.

Which he proceeded to do by carrying her off on those shoulders she loved so much like a caveman to their bedroom and making love to her all morning with such single-minded intensity that brought back memories of their youth, when it was only the two of them.

"Remember the time we tried to do the dinner and dancing thing on our first anniversary here at home?" Tadashi asked, his arm around her shoulders and fingertips tracing lazy patterns on her skin as she rested her head against his chest, her left leg thrown over his. The rays of the late morning sun peeked through the slats of the blinds, illuminating the dust motes that Elsa watched as she tried to catch her breath from what they had just done. She listened to the sound of his still-racing heartbeat to reassure herself that what she had with him was real—there were still days when the thought of losing him to an accident would come out of nowhere, especially when he was away on business trips. Her accident and the loss of her parents had left such a mark on her that she could not shake it off completely.

"Elsa?" he prompted.

"Give me a minute," she mumbled against him to hide her sudden spike of anxiety. "You wore me out."

She could hear the smirk in his voice. "Don't tell me you're getting old," he teased. "You're only forty—ow!" he yelped when Elsa pinched him. "Damn, woman, that hurt!" he protested.

"That's for calling me old," she snapped jokingly. "And yes, I do remember what happened. You were trying to get me to do that leg flip thing tango dancers do, and the _one_ time I managed it, my prosthetic flew off. That nice vase Aunt Cass gave me for my birthday was the casualty." She paused, giggling. "In hindsight, it _was_ pretty funny, but it wasn't back then. I really liked that vase."

"Hey, I had it replaced, did I?"

"Only because you didn't want to piss me off more than you had. And how can I forget the googly eyes incident?"

Tadashi groaned. "You're never going to let me live it down, would you?"

"No."

"Man, I wish I'd taken a picture. You have no idea how funny that was, googly eyes on your pregnant stomach," he laughed.

Elsa propped herself up on her elbow to look down on Tadashi, whose eyes were still dancing with amusement. "You were such a dork. Actually, you still are," she amended. "An old one."

"Hey!"

"You're mine, though. My dork," she said with affection, tweaking his nose playfully. Tadashi's eyes turned serious at her words, which made her worry a bit. "What?" she asked. "I—"

He stopped her with a kiss, pushing her down on her back. "And you're mine," he rumbled in her ear, peppering kisses down her neck, to her collarbone, then to her breasts, making her arch against him with a soft moan.

"T-tadashi?" she stammered when he started down her stomach. He stopped, his possessive brown gaze burning into her wide blue ones before it traveled over her body. His fingertips traced the silvery lines that childbirth had left her.

"Thank you," he whispered against her stomach before resting his head sideways on it. "For everything."

Elsa swallowed the sudden lump in her throat that formed at his words. "I should be saying that to you."

She felt him smile against her. "I love you," he replied, his face still turned away, but she didn't need to see him to know he meant it—the quiet intensity in his voice clued her in. She responded by running her fingers through his hair, still thick and soft despite his age.

They spent most of the day in bed, reminiscing about their years together, and making plans for the future. "We still have a couple more years in us, right?" Tadashi mused, staring at the ceiling. "What do you say we go to Norway for old times' sake?"

"Sounds like a plan."

 _Meanwhile, about twenty miles away…_

"What do you think Mama and Papa are doing, Haruki?"

"Probably enjoying alone time together." Slap. "Ow! What was that for? Quit looking at me like that, you know how parents are when they've got an empty nest. They're probably doing unspeakable things on the kitchen table."

Shove. "Ew, get your mind out of the gutter, they're our parents!"

"And how do you suppose we ended up existing, huh? Immaculate conception?"

"Ugh. I regret asking you that. Just drive, please?"

"Yes, oh slave master."


	7. In Summer

San Fransokyo summers can get terribly hot, and today was no exception. The temperature soared to a simmering 93.2F. Tadashi was in the garage, working on Baymax. Man, what he wouldn't give to work at SFIT's airconditioned lab, but it was currently under renovation because a couple of students' experiments and tests went horribly out of control and blew a hole in the wall (Baymax was, thankfully, not involved in it).

"Ah, if only Elsa were here," he muttered, wiping the sweat off his brow. But she was in Norway to visit her sister. She wanted him to go with her, but he begged off—just because she was filthy rich and the future CEO of one of the best tech companies in the world, doesn't mean that he'll freeload off her. No, he'll save up for it then go with her next time.

But he was beginning to regret his decision, because 1) she flew to Norway on her family's private jet, which meant saving up was a moot point, 2) he could literally be chilling right now instead of sweating in this infernal heat, 3) he could be cuddling with Elsa, and 4) she wouldn't be pissed at him.

He regretted #3 and #4 a lot. He missed her. Stupid, stupid pride. Why had he said such a boneheaded thing? Elsa wasn't one to flaunt her wealth—she was one of the most low-key persons he had ever known besides Fred, whose family's wealth rivaled hers.

It's interesting how those two didn't flaunt their wealth, now that he thought about it.

"Must be nice not to worry about money," he muttered when Elsa told him she'd be using her family's private jet to fly back to Norway.

"Excuse me?" Elsa's eyes narrowed.

"Nothing! Well, you know, it's just..." he trailed off, shrugging.

His family wasn't poor, but they had gone through some hard years. The worst had been when he was in high school—he remembered seeing Aunt Cass hunched on the kitchen table with her calculator, surrounded by paperwork. She had never spoken to him about it, but Tadashi had guessed the cafe was in financial trouble. And he was graduating in two years—what about college?

It was then he realized he had to let go of his dream to become a doctor. When his parents died, his grandparents had offered to take him and Hiro in—the problem was, they were located in Japan, and he didn't want to move. San Fransokyo was HOME. Aunt Cass must have realized that the boys had suffered enough—moving them to a completely unfamiliar place after they had suffered a tragedy was too much, and as such had taken them in.

For that, Tadashi had vowed to make things as easy as possible for his angel of an aunt. It was the least he could do.

And so, he ended up at SFIT as a robotics engineering major. While he had his heart set on becoming a doctor, SFIT was the practical choice. Besides, he was also interested in robotics. Tadashi suspected that had he not idolized his father that much, and had his father not died, he would have been involved in robotics.

Funny how things had turned out.

"Just what, Tadashi?" Elsa demanded, crossing her arms over her chest and raising an imperious eyebrow at him.

"Nothing! I don't want to mooch off you, that's all. I want to pay my own way," he protested lamely.

Elsa's demeanor became eerily calm, which alarmed Tadashi. Not good, he gulped. She's pissed.

"Fine. See you in a couple of weeks, then." With that, she spun and stalked off.

Tadashi felt like a heel. Why had he done that? It's not as if she asked to be born rich, right? And she had never rubbed his face into the fact that she could probably buy him if she wanted to. Elsa was simply being practical and she wanted him with her. Why had he made such a big deal about it?

Sometimes it's hard to think of Elsa as this...billionaire tech heiress and future CEO, so when she casually refers to her family's private jet or absently corrects him about obscure and upcoming tech, he's floored and was reminded that she's way out of his league.

That maybe one day, Elsa will wise up and realize he's just a regular guy with no place in her world.

"Aaaaugh!" Tadashi threw up his hands, unable to stand the guilt and the heat. Elsa still had a week to go in Norway—maybe if he borrowed money from Aunt Cass to chase after Elsa, he could apologize for being such a prideful jerk. Just how much would it cost to fly from San Fransokyo to Norway, anyway? And if things went well, maybe he could appeal to Elsa's practical nature and hitch a ride on her family's private jet on the way back?

Tadashi groaned and and thunked his head against Baymax's metal frame. The robot's vinyl covering had been stripped away so he could tinker and upgrade its actuators and its battery. Hiro had suggested replacing Baymax's lithium ion batteries with supercapacitors.

"Gah, I'm sorry, Elsa," he moaned, still slumped against Baymax. "Damn it, why is it so hot?" he complained, taking his cap off and fanning himself with it, wiping his forehead with the towel he had slung on his shoulder. He vaguely heard footsteps behind him and didn't bother turning around, thinking it was Hiro.

"Hey bro, I followed your advice and changed Baymax's lithium ion batteries to supercapacitors. I—" he cut himself off and started when a pair of slender arms wound around his shoulders and a cool breeze surrounded him. "Wha—?" Tadashi whipped his head around to see a smiling Elsa behind him, the late morning sun casting a halo around her bright head.

"Elsa?" Tadashi gaped, dumbfounded.

"Surprised?"

"Bu-but—you weren't—next week—" he stammered, jumping to his feet. He wrung his cap in his hands, his heart pounding over the surprise at seeing his girlfriend home a week earlier.

Elsa shrugged and sent a sheepish close-mouthed smile at him, rubbing her left arm with her right hand. "Yeah, I was supposed to be home next week, but..." she cleared her throat. "I missed you."

"I missed you too, Elsa. So much. And I'm sorry for being such a jerk about the plane thing, it's just..." he swallowed. How the heck was he going to explain it to her without sounding weird or worse, even more of a jerk? Because it seemed like he was jealous of her wealth or something.

No, not jealous. Insecure.

Elsa raised her eyebrows at him, waiting for him to continue. He decided to plow through and speak from the heart, hoping he wouldn't stick is foot in his mouth even deeper.

"I guess I'm just insecure," he muttered. "I mean, you're gorgeous, intelligent, rich, kind—you're basically way out of my league. The private jet thing reminded me of it, and I reacted badly. I'm sorry," he hung his head, fiddling nervously with his cap.

"You also know that I've got anxiety and depression, with a curse to boot, right?"Elsa pointed out, tilting her head down to peer at him.

"Listen to me—you are NOT cursed," he stated with an emphatic wave of his hand. "What you have—your powers—they make you unique and even more beautiful. I mean, snow—who wouldn't love snow? I love snow, you know." Tadashi knew he was babbling—Elsa's sudden appearance had fried his brain and he couldn't find the right words right now. But he hoped she understood just how much he loved that about her—how much he loved everything about her.

Elsa's eyes softened at his bumbling declaration and a slight smile curved her lips. She stepped closer to him, a mild arctic breeze swirling around her, ruffling their hair. "Is that so?" she asked, looking up at him.

God, those luminous eyes never failed to get his heart kicking wildly in his chest. "Yeah," he replied, jamming the cap back on his head. "So...yeah, sorry about...you know. Being an insecure jerk. Forgive me?" He pulled his lips down into a pout, meeting her amused gaze with a wide-eyed, innocent one.

"Fine, you're forgiven. Although I suspect you said you liked my powers because it can help you cool off today," she replied archly, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Well...you can't deny it has certain advantages on a day like this. And are you sure you want to be this close to me right now? I smell like an ox," he protested halfheartedly, his arms going around her waist.

"Shut up and kiss me. I've missed you." Elsa yanked the cap off his head and tossed it toward the nearby couch.

"Oh, if you insist." Tadashi grinned and complied, giving his all to kiss her senseless.


	8. Hunger

The subtle shifting of weight woke Elsa up. Cracking open a sleepy eye, she saw her husband of a month hunched over the side of the bed. She watched how the muscles of his back flexed as he bent down to pull on a pair of sweatpants. He stood up and stretched, raising his arms high over his head and holding that position for a minute, before loosening and rubbing the back of his neck. He turned and flashed a smile at her when he saw her looking at him.

"Hey." Elsa turned to her side and scooted over as Tadashi went around the bed to sit beside her. "Good morning," he greeted her, bending down to kiss her temple. She blinked up at him with bleary eyes and returned his greeting around a wide yawn, causing him to chuckle.

"You're not a morning person, are you?"

"Not today. After what you did to me last night?" Her voice was still scratchy from sleep.

"Alright, well, I'll get breakfast started. I'll call you when I'm done." He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, his finger lingering over her cheek before he stood up.

"Okay." She watched his retreating back as he strode out of their room, willing herself to wake up completely. Elsa winced as her muscles protested when she flopped on her back, but the pain reminded her of last night.

A lazy, satisfied smile stretched over her face as she recalled the previous night's events. True, she was rather sore—Tadashi, as she had come to know after they got married, was a gentle, considerate lover, but she sensed a part of him had always held back. While she appreciated the slow, caring way he made love to her, Elsa had wondered what he would be like if he just let it go, whatever it was that held him back from…well, ravaging her.

 _Last night answered that, I guess,_ she mused, biting her lip to suppress a smile.

She sorted through her memories as she waited for Tadashi to finish fixing breakfast. How did it start again? Ah, yes, it started when she was taking a bath at around six-thirty, waiting for him to come home…

* * *

She had been lounging in the bathtub that night. As always, it drifted back toward her husband. Who would blame her? She was a new wife, and married to such a fine-looking man at that, despite the scars he bore on his back and left arm because of an accident during their college years. He was tall and leanly muscled, with thick, jet-black hair she loved to run her fingers through. He also knew exactly how to make her body sing with pleasure using his hands and lips, his exploration of her always slow and thorough. He was an expert when it came to where her sensitive spots are and how he should touch them to make her gasp and mewl.

Her hands had unknowingly wandered toward the apex of her thighs. She closed her eyes and released a slow breath, imagining they were his hands instead of hers that stroked up and down. In her mind's eye, she could see him looming over her, lust darkening his eyes as he whispered encouragement for her to fly—

The sound of the bathroom door opening jarred Elsa out of her fantasies, causing her to start and slosh water from the bathtub. Her gaze flew toward the doorway, where she found Tadashi pinning her with an intense stare, his hand gripping the doorjamb like a claw. She felt a blush creeping up her neck to suffuse her face—and found herself momentarily embarrassed over being caught…well, touching herself.

But she was married, damn it. Why was she embarrassed? Steeling herself, Elsa cleared her throat and said, "You're home early."

"It's already eight."

"What?" A quick glance at the high window confirmed what Tadashi said—day had already given way to night. But how—must've been the stupid clock, ran out of batteries again! She could have sworn she started her bath at six-thirty. "Oh no," Elsa groaned, standing up to retrieve her towel that hung nearby, unmindful that she was completely wet and naked before him. "I'm sorry, I haven't made dinner yet, I—"

"Forget dinner."

"Huh?" The low growl in Tadashi's voice stirred something in her, and she turned her head slowly to meet her husband's eyes. He was hungry, alright.

Hungry for her.

He reached her in three steps, and heedless that she was still wet from her bath, he wrapped an arm around her waist and kissed her, almost brutally, prying her mouth open with his so he could plunge his tongue in to play with hers. Despite his uncharacteristic aggression, his right hand cradled the back of her head protectively. Elsa was unable to hold back from moaning, clutching at his shoulders when she felt her knees going weak at his forceful display. _Where had that come from?_ she wondered, dazed as she pulled away for air.

"Your suit," she mumbled, bracing her hands over his chest to push him away. He had worn the three-piece Savile Row suit she had made for him today because he had met with some government bigwigs to propose the mass production of robots like Baymax for nationwide healthcare. He had styled his hair with care, parting it to the left and sweeping back the bangs she loved to fiddle with from his forehead. But now his hair was a mess, the front of his suit completely soaked.

The dampness also made his desire for her more than apparent.

"You know," Tadashi began, lifting her out of the tub and setting her on her feet, "I thought of you the entire day. During the meeting, the mahogany conference table made me think how it contrasted with your skin." He grabbed her towel from the rack and started drying her off, his movements brisk but gentle, and when he reached her breasts, he bent and gave each one a brief suckle, making her keen softly as a bolt of pleasure shot through her. "The pink roses the receptionist kept reminded me of these." He went down on his knees to dry off her legs, but he put the towel aside and looked up at her, running his hands over the back of her legs with a featherlight touch. She shivered with anticipation. Would he—?

"Those roses especially reminded me of this."

He ran a finger down then up over her slickness, looking up at her with a wicked smirk twisting his mouth. "Like that, hmm?" His smirk grew when she nodded, her breath hitching.

What happened to her gentle lover of a husband? Why was he teasing her like this? But by God, she loved it. She could not tear her gaze away from his knowing, leering one.

 _Is he going to…?_

"Beg for it."

Those three words practically made her combust as he moved his head close to her, breathing out small, warm puffs to tease her.

"Please, anata. Please…" Anata—a bit of an old-fashioned term meaning dear, in Japanese. She had learned from Aunt Cass that his parents used to call each other that. Desperate as she may be, her reserved nature wouldn't let her say it, but at that moment all she wanted was his mouth on her, laving and tasting her and—

"Fuck!" She choked out the expletive when what she desired the most at that moment happened. Tadashi had buried his face between her thighs, drinking her in, flattening his tongue against her and licking up before pursing his lips over the sensitive bundle of nerves. His finger worked over her as well, and she fought to keep her legs steady as sharp pleasure spiked through her. Her hands tangled themselves in his hair to urge him on—she was so close—

She screamed his name as her orgasm crashed over her. Her knees gave out, but Tadashi's hands steadied her as she scrabbled for purchase on his shoulders, breathing hard and trembling with exertion. Once she regained her senses, Elsa blinked down at her husband, who licked his lips and the finger he had used to make her come before standing up.

"Fuck, huh?" he said conversationally, scooping her up in his arms and walking to their bedroom. "First time I've heard you say it. I should do that more often so you'd say that more, too." He raised an eyebrow at her, a lopsided smile lifting the corner of his mouth.

"You sound so pleased with yourself." Elsa gave him a feeble shove, still feeling the sparks of the fierce release running through her nerves after what he had done to her, leaving her boneless in his arms. While it wasn't the first time he had—oh, she might as well say it in her head, considering what she had screamed out before—eaten her out, there was something about his demeanor that made it different. The predatory glint in his eye, perhaps. Or maybe the commanding way he ordered her to beg for it.

But her gentle husband was still there underneath. He had surfaced briefly when she called him anata—his brown eyes softened and a slight smile graced his lips, so different from the smirk he had worn when he made her beg.

She still wanted to know what made him act rather out of character, though. "Who are you and what have you done to my Tadashi?" she asked as he set her down on their bed. Elsa watched as he yanked his tie off with one hand, a gesture she found unexpectedly sexy. He shed his clothes with care, draping his jacket, vest, pants, and tie over the back of the dresser chair, and to put his white shirt and underwear in the nearby hamper. He stood beside the bed, his piercing, scrutinizing stare raking over her that she practically felt it. Elsa resisted the urge to cover herself and followed his lead, her eyes slowly appraising her husband.

He had a swimmer's build—broad shoulders tapering down to narrow hips, long arms and legs, big feet and hands. He didn't have a gym rat's body with muscles that were overly defined, but he kept himself fit through karate. The line of hair that started from his navel caught her eye, leading her toward his proud erection.

Heat pooled low in her belly. "Are you just going to stand there, or do you plan to do something about that?" she challenged him, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, I plan to do something about this, anata." Tadashi crawled toward her, covering her body with his as he leaned down to kiss her long and deep. He was slower this time, but no less intense. Elsa opened her mouth to his and their tongues clashed and dueled before she pulled back slightly so she could nip at his bottom lip, catching him by surprise. He chuckled as he trailed kisses down her neck to her chest, his thumbs tweaking her nipples before one thumb was replaced by his mouth. Elsa released a low, shuddering sigh as he teased and suckled her breasts, one after the other, before moving down to her flat stomach. He flicked a hooded glance up at her to ask if he should continue, and she shook her head, which puzzled him long enough so that she could take him by surprise and flip him on his back.

"Wh—hey!"

"Turnabout's fair play, you know," Elsa smirked, kissing him into silence. She was determined to continue their heated exchange, this time with her in charge—as she kissed him, her left hand slid down his stomach to cup his balls and knead them gently. She felt him buck under her, his body tensing, as she continued her gentle ministrations. She then moved her hand up to stroke his shaft three times before circling the tip with her thumb. Breaking off the kiss, Elsa kept her eyes on him as she went down on him, relishing how he groaned and threw his head back against the bed when her mouth closed over him.

She loved the taste of him. Her tongue circled the head twice, savoring the saltiness that leaked out, before flicking the tip against its underside. She heard him bite out "fuck" as she had earlier, exciting her more and making a mental note to be more open to coarse language. It did seem to spice things up. She took in as much as she could of his length before releasing him with a soft pop.

Elsa opened her mouth to say something, but was cut off when she was urged to her hands and knees by Tadashi. "Look over there," he said, pointing to her dresser. Following where he pointed, she gasped—she never suspected that the mirror would give them a full view of what they were doing, with her on all fours and him on his knees, his manhood brushing against her entrance.

"You know what I always say—find a new angle," he murmured before nipping at her earlobe. Then he slid inside her, a soft groan escaping him as he did. Elsa sighed and started to bend down to raise her bottom, but Tadashi cupped her chin to make her look at the mirror. "Watch," he ordered as he started moving. "Don't look away." He thrust once, twice, before bending down to whisper in her ear. "Don't look away. It's beautiful. You're beautiful." He kissed her shoulder before placing his hands on her waist to move again.

And she couldn't look away. Her eyes were drawn to his face—his hard jaw, heavy black brows knitted together in concentration, nostrils flaring with exertion. At the same time, the sensation of their bodies locked in a dance as old as time made her climax all but imminent. She could feel it coming, so close, but she gritted her teeth and willed it away because Tadashi—he's not yet—

"I'm close," he ground out, his lips curled back in a grimace. "Elsa, you—"

She let herself go with a cry, dimly registering his answering one as she reached her peak, as he filled her with an exquisite warmth. White flared from behind her tightly closed eyes as she collapsed, with Tadashi sprawled over her back. His hot breath tickled her neck, causing goosebumps to break along her skin, but she was too drained to do anything about it as she waited for her frantically hammering heart to calm down.

He stirred. "Am I squishing you?" he asked, rather inanely.

She made a muffled noise of agreement, making him chuckle. He rolled off her back and gathered her in his arms, tucking her against his chest.

"Are you okay?" Tadashi whispered, the intensity she had glimpsed when they started was fading away to concern. "I hope I wasn't…too rough on you."

Elsa gave herself a quick once over and shook her head. "I'll be fine," she dismissed with a limp wave of her hand. "You wore me out, though. I'm hungry, but I'm too tired to get up," she grumbled, closing her eyes and throwing her leg over his. "Plus, my hair's still wet. It'll be a mess tomorrow."

He laughed quietly. "I'll make it up to you—cook you a nice, big breakfast. What do you want?"

"Bacon, toast, and eggs. Hot chocolate. Aunt Cass's donuts. The works."

"What an appetite," he teased, putting his hand up when she glared at him. "Alright, big breakfast it is. Go to sleep, Elsa."

And she had.

* * *

Elsa looked at Tadashi speculatively as she nibbled on a piece of bacon. She had donned her robe, a short, gray one with cherry blossoms printed on it. He was reading the paper, with a little frown marring his forehead. The table they shared was small enough so she reached over and smoothed away the frown with her index and middle finger.

"It's too early in the morning to be frowning," she remarked. "What's wrong?"

"I want to apologize," he began. Her brows shot up at his words. What was there for him to be sorry for? She waited for him to continue. "I was too rough on you last night. You were walking a bit funny when you went out of our room."

For a split second she thought he was joking, but he regarded her solemnly. _He's serious,_ she realized, and she had no idea how to respond. While it was true that she was experiencing some discomfort, it wasn't as if she were badly hurt or anything. In fact, she loved what had happened between them last night and was just searching for the right opening to tell him so.

This was unexpected.

"Um," she floundered. "Well…wait, hang on, before I answer that, answer me this—did something happen to you before—uh—last night? Because you were acting a little weird."

Tadashi sighed, sipping his coffee before answering. "My proposal was rejected."

"Oh, no." Her heart went out to him. It was the culmination of his dream, to have nursebots like Baymax to help people. "Why?"

"Budget issues, health care legislation problems, said it wasn't feasible…you know how it is. Why did I even get my hopes up?" He chuckled self-deprecatingly, rubbing the back of his neck before resting his chin on his hand. "I was so frustrated that my mind started to wander…toward you, I suppose. That, combined with my frustration, well…" he shrugged and trailed off, meeting her gaze sheepishly. "I'm sorry for taking it out on you." He started rubbing on the burn scars that covered the upper part of his left arm, cluing Elsa in that he was about to spiral down that path of doubt and fear. He smiled, but it had a sardonic edge to it that made her a little nervous. "I used you last night, Elsa. I wanted to feel alive, because after having my dream ever since I was kid shot down like that, I don't know if there's anything I could live for." He snorted. "That's probably too much, but…well, that's how it feels, anyway."

She tamped down on her temper. She couldn't stand to hear him say things like that, but she couldn't bring herself to be that upset by it either—after all, she also went through something similar, what with her spending thirteen years in isolation, then inadvertently killing her sister. With him, the accident that had caused his burn scars reminded him of his mortality, and how close he was to leaving her and Hiro alone. She knew that the thought still haunted him sometimes—caused him rare nightmares, even now, even after years had passed.

"Hey." She stood up and pulled him to his feet, steering him toward the sofa and pushing him down. She draped herself on top of him, fixing her eyes on his to drive her point home. "If you ever find yourself in that situation again, use me to remind yourself that you're alive. That you've got so much to live for." Elsa paused, debating on whether or not she should tell him. She had dismissed the idea since it was too early to tell, and she didn't want to raise his hopes.

But maybe now was the time.

"You've got so much to live for," she repeated, willing him to understand. Confusion filled Tadashi's eyes, until the realization of what she was trying to tell him began to dawn on him.

"You mean…?"

"I'm not sure, but yes, there's a strong possibility. I missed my period."

Tadashi released the breath he held before breaking out into a wide smile. "Then we'd better make sure, shouldn't we?" he said before pulling her down for a kiss.

"Yes," she agreed as they lost themselves in each other and the rays of the morning sun shone down on them.


	9. This Kiss

Our first kiss had been a tentative brush of lips, lasting no more than a couple of seconds, before we laughed, breathless and relieved, resting our foreheads together. I hadn't wanted to rush things considering how inexperienced Elsa was. Not that I was that experienced myself—because even though I was (uncomfortably) aware of my status as a 'campus cutie', as Fred had dubbed me as, I had only dated three girls so far, and not too seriously at that. By my third year at college, I had been so busy juggling school, helping out at the café, and keeping an eye out for Hiro that dating and the…stuff that goes along with it just fell by the wayside.

At least, until I met Elsa.

Oh, I didn't fall for her immediately—I like thinking I'm too level-headed for that. But I wasn't blind to her physical charms, either. I mean, I'm a guy, and I'd have to be dead not to notice her pale blonde hair, intense blue eyes, her killer figure, and her rare smile that was an irresistible mix of innocence and sass.

I have a thing for big…brains. Come on, what'd you think I'd say, huh? I mean, she's the smartest girl I've ever met.

Looking back, falling for her was like the big drop of a rollercoaster—a slow and steady climb with a huge drop at the end. I guess fell hard when I saw her huddled by the side of the Ishioka robotics lab, her shoulders wracking with silent sobs. That had probably stirred my protective instincts and made me realize that I'd do anything to make her smile again. My persistence and patience had paid off several excruciating months later—I say it's excruciating because Elsa had been such a tough nut to crack. She wouldn't willingly give up her secrets without a fight, and when she had finally opened up to me, I understood why.

Ice powers and isolation for thirteen years. Who knew? I never would have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes. But unlike how Elsa saw her powers, I thought it was beautiful, just like her. I mean, I'm a science guy, but man, with her looks and powers, she's practically a goddess.

But she doesn't see herself that way—she thinks she's cursed. So since then, I had decided to convince her otherwise, no matter how long it takes. I'm not giving up on her.

It's been a week since our first kiss and it's been…oh man, I just—it's wonderful. I've never felt so happy and scared at the same time. If there's anything Elsa and I had learned, happiness is fleeting. I had lost my parents; she had lost hers, been isolated for thirteen years because of her powers, and almost lost her sister, too. One must grab hold of happiness and never let it go, but there's always this niggling thought that it may be lost.

I've always thought love would be hearts and roses and fuzzy feelings like most people do, but I'm beginning to see that it also involves intense emotions and reactions, which are not necessarily bad, it's just that sometimes those feelings can get rather…uh, overwhelming. Sometimes it's like I'm in a tug-of-war—on one hand I just want to hold her close and breathe in the scent of her hair, but then I'd catch my mind wandering toward VERY tempting thoughts.

I'd usually catch my hand starting to as well. Good thing I'm able to control it—Elsa hadn't noticed anything (I think).

Well, anyway, we're caught in a sudden downpour as we head to her apartment, which is only a ten-minute walk from SFIT's entrance. I swear the skies dumped bucketfuls of water down on us just as we are couple of feet away from the campus entrance. Lightning streaks across the rapidly darkening sky, followed by the deafening crack of thunder a second later, which made Elsa jump and clutch at my arm. It startles her so much that she leaves a frosty handprint on my sleeve.

"Sorry about that," Elsa says, wincing. "The thunder, it—" She stops when the rain starts pelting us hard.

"Forget about it. Run!" I grab her hand and we dash toward the entrance archway. "Whew," I breathe once we are safely under the archway. I glance at Elsa to check if she's okay and she tosses a small smile at me to reassure me that she is.

I didn't bring an umbrella because the sun had been shining so brightly earlier that day. Elsa didn't too, and I asked her why—she is usually such a girl scout when it comes to such things.

"Woke up late," she mutters, hitching her backpack higher on her shoulder. "By the time I realized I'd left my umbrella, I was already here and it didn't make any sense to run back home for it. And my first class was with Chang—you know how he is with tardiness."

Oh yeah. If you're late, you're locked out of the classroom.

"Great, home's just ten minutes away, but we're stuck here because of the rain. Of all the rotten luck. I really am cursed," Elsa complains.

I shake my head. "Nope. You're not cursed, okay? I think it's a good thing, because you get to spend more time with me, right?" I wiggle my eyebrows at her, grinning. I know what she said about her being cursed was a joke, but I don't like hearing that from her, so I do everything I can to make her think otherwise.

"No offense, but I'd rather spend time with you at my apartment where it's warm and dry," she deadpans before jutting out her bottom lip as she scowls at the dark skies. I couldn't help it—I let out a chuckle at the sight of her pouting at the rain.

"What?"

"Aw, just that you looked so cute with that pout." I pinch her cheek gently. She bats my hand away and raise an eyebrow at me, rapping her knuckles on my forehead.

"Focus, genius. Do you know anyone with an extra umbrella?" she asks with a mild glare. I laugh, grasping her wrist to bring her hand down.

"Wasabi, maybe. He's a girl scout just like you." I don't let go of her hand, entwining my fingers with hers and rubbing my thumb against her skin. Might be a good time to make my move—I tug her toward me to—

"I heard that," a voice pipes up from behind us, which makes Elsa yank her hand back and step away from me. I groan inwardly—perfect timing, Wasabi. "But since I'm a good friend, I would lend you my extra umbrella—" at those words Elsa's eyes light up— "but Gogo had beaten you to it. Sorry, Elsa." Wasabi gives her an apologetic smile.

"Well, I appreciate the offer, Wasabi. Guess I'll just have to wait for the rain to stop." Elsa shrugs.

"She swiped it from you, didn't she?" I guess. "While you were debating whether to use the green or blue one?" I turn toward Elsa to explain. "This guy here has two umbrellas and he keeps one in his locker. Gogo must've come out of nowhere and grabbed one of them."

"Right under my nose," he mutters. "Like, literally. The girl's a practically a ninja."

I shake my head. "Dude, you are so whipped."

"Yeah, well, at least she didn't get the bigger one," Wasabi remarks, opening a big blue umbrella, which gives me an idea.

"Hey, you're headed to work, right? That Starbucks by Pacific Place? Elsa lives at the building next door—you okay with walking her home? Should be enough space for both of you under that umbrella," I suggest.

"Sure."

"What, no!"

Wasabi and I look down at her in surprise and she blushes at her adamant response. "I don't—um—" she falters and licks her lips nervously, clearing her throat. "Sorry, Wasabi. I just don't want to leave Tadashi alone here." Then, as if realizing she had just said something very embarrassing, she bites her lip and ducks her head, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear.

"Ooookay," Wasabi backs off, his eyes darting between me and Elsa. "No worries. I'll see you guys around, then." He pats Elsa's shoulder to reassure her that everything's cool, and with that he heads out into the rain.

And so, it's just Elsa and me. Well, the awkward silence is a third wheel, but what she had blurted out earlier pretty much blows my mind.

Elsa loves me. She really does.

I mean, sure—we've kissed, only once, last week. And I was—still am, actually—scared that one day she'll shut me out. I know she has feelings for me, it's as clear as day, and I know actions speak louder than words, but it is such a relief to have heard her say that.

Okay, so she hasn't said the L-word yet, but…

Elsa finally raises her head to meet my eyes, and she's taken aback by what she sees: the biggest, cheesiest grin splitting my face.

She frowns in confusion and steps back. "What's with the smile? Why are you looking at me like that?"

Should I? Ah, what the heck. I close the distance between us and tip her face up to mine. God, she's so beautiful. I could easily and happily drown in those blue eyes of hers, and now mine are drawn toward her soft lips. My thumb runs over her lips, and I flick my gaze up to see her frown melt away, her eyes dilated over my actions. It gives me the courage to say what I had in mind.

"You love me, right?"

Her mouth forms a surprised o. "E-excuse me?"

"When you said you didn't want to leave me here, it's because you love me, don't you?" Oh no, I'm not going to let her off the hook that easily. I want to hear it. I need to hear her say it.

"Well, I—I—hang on, you haven't even said it yourself!" Elsa exclaims, shaking me off to cross her arms over her chest. Nervousness makes her back stiff and straight, and her backpack slides off her shoulder. She hitches the backpack's straps on both her shoulders, a challenge in her eyes.

"Really? Okay, then. I love you, Elsa." I cup the back of her head, my fingers tangled in her hair. There's no way I'm letting her go now. Elsa's eyes widen as her hands grab hold of my forearms. Her palms are warm against my skin, and I could see a blush reddening her cheeks over my declaration. "When I saw you crying at Ishioka, I promised myself that I'll do whatever it takes to make you smile. I'm not giving up on you. Even when you push me away—but I hope you won't—I'll always be here for you. And I totally mean that in a non-stalkery way," I murmur after a pause to lighten the mood, cracking a small smile.

"Tadashi…"

"Will you let me kiss you?"

The rain is white noise over the pulse pounding in my ears as I wait for Elsa to respond.

"I…" Elsa trails off, blinking as she licked her lips. "Okay." She looks at me through half-lidded eyes, and I almost lose control when my mind flashes images of her looking at me like that from underneath me. I take a deep breath to calm myself down—this is not the time to think about…well.

I bend closer to rest my forehead against hers, and I could feel the warmth of her breath against my mouth. "Tell me you love me, Elsa." I try to hide the pleading note in my voice, but something tells me she heard it.

"Yes. I love you, Tadashi. I love you so much," she whispers, her hands sliding up over my nape into my hair. "I can't…" she stops, and I wonder what she wants to say. But I never had the chance to find out because she decides to show me. Her fingers flexing against the base of my head is all the warning I get before she presses her lips to mine.

Holy Mother of Megazon.

Surprise over what she did made my jaw drop open and my body to freeze for a second. She kisses my bottom lip first before sliding her tongue into my mouth gently and hesitantly, as if gauging how I would react. Once my brain caught up with what's happening (holy crap, I'm kissing the girl I'm crazy about, get with the program, brain!), I do the same, my tongue playing with hers. We pull back for a second to take a breath before resuming our kiss. She's more into it this time, her hands sliding down to my sides to pull me closer, while mine cradles her jaw as I slant my mouth against hers to taste her fully, to kiss her deeply.

I swear to God I'm never letting her go. This girl owns me. She leaves me undone over her kiss, and I'm shaking when the need to breathe forces me to break away from her. Damn it, why can't I open my eyes?

Elsa gives my bottom lip a a little nip before breaking away from me. "Are you alright?" she murmurs after a few breathless moments. Opening my eyes is a struggle, but I'm finally able to when I feel her hand on my cheek.

"Yeah." Why is my voice hoarse? And I feel like I just ran a marathon—my heart is pounding hard against my chest. Giddiness over what we had just done made me lightheaded, but I manage to get a grip on myself. I straighten to my full height to gaze down at Elsa, who gives me the sweetest smile I've ever seen.

"I love you, Tadashi," she murmurs, quiet yet confident. "I'm still trying to get used to the idea of us, so I'm sorry if I made you doubt my feelings for you. I—"

My finger over her lips silences her. "I know. And hey, the rain has stopped," I remark, smiling. "What do you say we continue this discussion at your place?"

Elsa lets out a snort of laughter and reaches out to hold my hand. She kisses the back of my hand, sending tingles up my arm. "Sounds good to me," she grins. "Come on, before Mother Nature changes her mind." She all but drags me down the steps of the SFIT archway, making me laugh at her impatience.

As much as I want this to end on a cliché—blue skies and the sunlight streaming through the clouds—life doesn't work out that way. The skies remain an ominous gray and thunder rumbles in the distance, a warning that more rain is coming. I know I will face challenges in my relationship with Elsa because of her powers and anxieties. I love her all the more for it.

I will be right here. I'm not giving up on you, Elsa.


	10. Making a New Friend

_**Note:** This was previously an Interlude chapter in One Year, but after I reread it, I thought this and the other Interlude chapter were out of place and moved them here. FYI. Thanks._

* * *

"Can we go now, tou-san? The plane's here already," Tadashi asked, a whiny note in his voice. He had his face pressed against the glass, watching the hustle and bustle on the runway. He had read up on planes a couple of days before, and he knew that once the tube thingy was attached to the plane, people can start getting on it.

"Not yet, Dashi-kun. We have to wait for them to call us," Akihiko Hamada answered him, looking up from his smartphone. Father and son were spitting images of each other, save for the nose—the younger Hamada had inherited that particular feature from his mother.

Tadashi pouted. This was so boring. His minitab had already run out of power, which left him with nothing to entertain himself with—and he was so close to finishing Level 7 of Hamster Wars!

"Can I borrow your phone?" he asked his father, who shook his head no.

"Sorry, buddy. This is a boring phone. It doesn't have games. Unless you want to read the news?" Akihiko held out his phone, which prominently displayed the website for the San Fransokyo Times.

"That's boring. I'm gonna go look around."

"Don't wander off too far, Dashi. Just stay close," his father warned him.

"Uh-huh." By then the boy had scampered off to the back of the gate lobby, where a family of four was seated. Normally he wouldn't have paid attention to them because they weren't interesting. The woman was asleep, resting her head on her husband's shoulder, while their younger daughter was doing the same thing, her coppery head on her older sister's lap.

Tadashi was just about to go back to his parents when his ears pricked at the sound of someone singing.

"Byssan lulle barnet, gryta henger i jarnet..."

He followed the source of the sound and found that it came from the girl that was letting her sister sleep on her lap. His curiosity was piqued—what was the girl saying? The language she used was unlike anything he had ever heard.

And she had the nicest voice, too.

The girl must have noticed him staring at her, because she stopped singing and looked straight back at him. Tadashi's heart leapt when their eyes met. The girl's eyes were the same color as his favorite cap, which he wore right now (bright blue and worn backwards, because he saw it once in a movie and thought it was cool).

He blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"Hi." He waved once, smiling.

The girl returned his smile and nodded. But she didn't speak, placing a finger over her lips and looking down at the sleeping toddler on her lap. Tadashi mouthed a 'whoops' and winced apologetically at her. She only smiled again and shook her head.

Tadashi bit his lip, trying to think of something to say to the girl. He didn't know why, but he wanted to talk to this girl. Probably because she was pretty. Besides having eyes that were his favorite shade of blue, she had really nice hair too—pale blonde, which was tied in a neat braid and held back with a headband.

"Do you speak English?" he asked, curious. He hoped she did.

The girl hesitated before answering. "Yes, I do," she replied, which made him grin.

"That's so cool! I can speak Japanese too," he informed her with a proud grin. "What were you singing?"

"It's a lullaby from Norway. I'm Norwegian." She tilted her head. "You're Japanese?" He felt something funny in his stomach, because no girl had ever looked at him that way, as if he were the only person in the world. Most of the girls he knew were always giggling over stupid girly things.

This girl...she seemed different.

"Nah, I'm Japanese-American. My dad's from Japan, and my mom's American," he explained, snapping himself out of the momentary spell the girl's eyes had cast on him. "Me and my parents are going to Japan for vacation and to visit my grandparents. You're probably on our flight too, right?"

His voice must've been a bit too loud, because her younger sister stirred and frowned. Tadashi flinched. "Sorry," he whispered.

The girl shook her head and waved her hand. "It's okay," she whispered back. "We're going to Japan for vacation too. My dad has to work, though."

An awkward silence descended between them as the girl's sister's face relaxed back to slumber. Tadashi fidgeted, rubbing the back of his neck. What should he say next? Oh, right—he should introduce himself!

He was just about to do so when he heard his father call out for him. "Dashi-kun, time to go, buddy."

Tadashi turned his head toward his father then looked back at the girl. "I gotta go," he said, starting to walk backwards and pointing his thumb over his shoulder. But he wished he didn't, because it would have been nice to talk to the girl some more.

"Your name is Dashi?" the girl asked. He nodded and grinned.

"Yep. Nice meeting you!" He waved at the girl over his shoulder as he ran back to his parents.

"Made a new friend, huh?" Akihiko observed. Tadashi followed his father's line of sight and saw the girl waking her sister up. "She's pretty. Nice work, son." He felt his face grow hot over Akihiko's teasing.

"Tou-san!" he protested.

Akihiko raised his palms to placate his son. "Hey, I'm just saying you have good taste, just like your old man." He clapped a hand on Tadashi's shoulder. "Let's go."

Tadashi couldn't help but glance back at the girl. By then she had her sleepy sister by the hand and was obediently following her parents. She must have sensed his gaze on her, because she met his eyes once more and smiled at him.

He smiled back and wished he had been quick enough to ask for her name. Little did he know that someday, their paths would cross once more.


	11. Drabbleshots

_**Note:**_ _From Tumblr prompts #2 (Have you lost your damn mind?!), #27 (I'm pregnant), and #44 (If you die, I'm going to kill you). #27 is based on blunaowl's Snowboarding 'verse, which is also archived here._

* * *

Elsa knew that coppery head ANYWHERE, even if the head was presently turned away and its hair tied back in a high ponytail instead of its customary pigtails. "Anna?" she ventured, coming up to sit beside her younger sister on the couch, her brow furrowed slightly. "What are you doing here?"

Anna started and whirled around in surprise. "I could ask you the same thing!" she exclaimed. "Are you here to have your leg checked or something? Is it paining you again? I thought–"

"I'm fine, Anna," Elsa interrupted. Years have passed and she has long come to terms with her condition, but she still preferred to speak of it as little as possible. "What about you, what are you doing here? And where's Kristoff? Shouldn't he be with you here at the doctor?"

"Oh, didn't I tell you? His mountaineering buddies needed extra help, so he's in Norway for about a month. He left five days ago." Anna fidgeted under her sister's scrutiny. "What?" she asked, a tad defensive. "You and Tadashi were busy with moving to your new house and I didn't want to be a bother. I can manage on my own, you know." She raised an eyebrow at Elsa. "Speaking of which, let me ask you the same thing: again, what are you doing here, and does Tadashi know you're here?"

This time, it was Elsa's turn to squirm under Anna's gaze. "No," she answered, glancing away. "I just–I wanted to be sure before I tell him."

A note of worry colored Anna's tone. "Tell him what, Elsa?" She clutched at her older sister's forearm, her eyes wide.

"I–well–it's nothing to worry about, but–"

"Mrs. Hamada?" A woman with a clipboard appeared a few feet away from them. "Dr. Santos will see you now. Elsa nodded and started to rise from her seat, but was stopped when Anna clutched at her arm again. "Anna? What are you–?"

"I'm also here to see Dr. Santos."

Elsa froze at those words and slowly tilted her head down at Anna, who remained seated. Dr. Elisa Santos was Honey Lemon's aunt. Who happened to be an obstetrician. Which meant–

"Mrs. Hamada?" the woman prompted.

Elsa swallowed and cleared her throat. "Is it possible if my sister came with me?" she asked, her eyes not leaving Anna's wide ones, which were threatening to spill happy tears. "That way it'd be easier to know if we're both pregnant."

* * *

"Tadashi, no!" Hiro grabbed Tadashi's arm, his eyes pleading for his older brother not to be a hero. Tadashi stared back, torn between his brother and his mentor, then glanced at the burning building behind him. All it took was a split second to make up his mind.

"Callaghan's in there," he asserted, his pulse pounding in his ears. "Someone has to help."

At the back of his mind he asked himself why he was doing this. Surely professional firefighters were on their way. But every second counted—even if it was dangerous, Tadashi knew could do it. He should do it.

Because he was no longer the helpless eleven-year-old boy who stood by as a truck lost its brakes in front of his school and rammed into his parents' car, leaving him and his brother orphaned.

Tadashi shook his brother's hand off his arm and started toward the building, but he caught a flash of platinum blonde hair out of the corner of his eye.

"What the—Elsa!" he exclaimed, reaching out to grab her arm, but he missed. It was the Norwegian exchange student, Elsa Arendahl, a classmate of his in Callaghan's robotics class. "Dammit!" He darted after her into the blaze, his longer legs enabling him to catch up easily to her. He grabbed her shoulder and spun her around to face him. "Have you lost your damn mind? What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing," she retorted, shrugging off his hand from her shoulder. "Didn't you say someone has to help?"

"Yes, but—"

Tadashi never got to finish his finish his sentence as a groaning sound filled their ears. "Look out!" Elsa screamed, holding a hand out as a pillar of ice sprang up from the ground, knocking the concrete one away that threatened to crush them. Tadashi's jaw dropped, his eyes taking in the shining pillar of ice that Elsa apparently summoned from the ground.

"How—what—" he sputtered in disbelief.

"No time to explain," Elsa said tersely. "We have to find Callaghan NOW."

Tadashi nodded, shaking his head to clear it from disbelief. "Right behind you."

They dodged falling debris and jumping flames, with Elsa using her…unusual abilities to keep them safe. She summoned ice pillars from the ground to knock huge chunks of debris out of the way, or an ice shield when flames threatened to consume them. "Professor!" Tadashi bellowed over the roaring inferno. "Where are you?"

"Over there!" Elsa pointed.

Sure enough, Callaghan stood beside the stage. "Professor!" Tadashi called out, running toward his mentor. "Over here!"

But he never reached Callaghan. So focused was he on his destination that he failed to notice that the scaffolding that held one of the huge monitors suspended on the ceiling breaking with a sharp, metallic sound.

"Tadashi!"

He looked up and saw the monitor hurtling toward him as if in slow motion. He started to move, but instinct told him it was too late—he was doomed.

The next thing he knew, something tackled him to the ground, knocking the wind breath out of his lungs. The impact caused him to roll, and out of instinct he continued the momentum to unconsciously shield whoever was in his arms from the debris, his hand cradling the back of her head protectively. "Elsa?" he asked, dazed as he looked down at her, the choking dust, smoke, and heat swirling all around them. "Are you okay? You're not hurt?" he asked in between coughs.

"No," she gasped back, then punched him in the arm.

"Ow! What was that for?" he asked, aggrieved.

"If you die," she snapped, her eyes like twin blue flames underneath furrowed brows, "I'm going to kill you."


	12. The Talk

The distant rumble of thunder and the white noise of rain filled their ears as Tadashi buried his face in the crook of Elsa's neck, moaning her name. Splaying their arms and clasping their hands together tightly, he shuddered above her before he collapsed, his breath warming her skin. They stayed that way for a few blissful minutes. This was Elsa's favorite part of making love—the aftermath, when the entire length of him was pressed against hers that she felt his heart beating against his, their limbs tangled together, and their bodies still intimately joined even though the act was finished. She reached up to run her fingers through his damp hair because she knew how much he liked it.

Of course, she loved the act itself, which surprised her. Growing up, she never had those urges teenagers were said to feel—she supposed she had been too worried about her powers back then. Even after they had become a couple, the thought of sex never crossed her mind, content with kisses and cuddling with Tadashi. And he had never rushed her or gave any indication that he wanted her that way, at least until about two months ago, while seated on his lap as she kissed him heatedly (she had distantly registered how wanton she was being, but she didn't care because it felt so good to be with him like that), she felt his hand on her breast and his desire against her thigh. She had scrambled away from him in surprise, almost falling off the couch, and he had been embarrassed, but honest—he wanted her.

 _"H-how long have you…?" Elsa squeaked, gesturing vaguely toward his lower half to express what she couldn't say. Her mind was still awhirl over what happened, but then NATURALLY he would, because he's a guy, and guys think about that sort of thing most of the time, don't they?_

 _"Uh, well…from the start, I guess?" Tadashi's face was beet red, but he met her gaze head on. "Look, you're—God, you're beautiful, and believe me when I say I have the utmost respect for you, but I also want to touch and kiss you in places that I never have. It's…" he blew out a breath before continuing. "It's all love and lust and I don't know where one begins and one ends and I'm confused and terrified by it, okay?"_

 _His words sent a funny flutter low in her belly, but she forced herself to concentrate on the matter at hand. "So…now what?" Elsa asked, hating how uncertain and inane she sounded. This was so awkward, she wished the earth would open up and swallow her whole._

 _Tadashi shrugged and tried for a little grin. "We take it slow, I guess," he suggested. "Up to you how far you want us to go. I've never really felt this way myself—I'm just as lost as you are."_

 _"Have you…um…"_

 _"Had sex? Yeah. A few times. Wasn't all it was cracked up to be, but I think for me it has to be with the right person. You. But I'm willing to wait. Or if you decide not to, it's okay." He shrugged again, obviously trying to play it cool, but Elsa could see how much it affected him._

 _"Tadashi…" she reached out then pulled her hand back, placing it over the other on her lap. It hit her just now that she absolutely hated the idea of other girls with her boyfriend, but she was elated to learn that of all the girls he could have picked, he wanted her. Elsa wished she knew what to do or say to get rid of the weird mix of jealousy and euphoria that made her head spin with confusion._

 _"What about you?"_

 _She shot him a dry look. "No."_

 _"Sorry. I just…" He trailed off then stood up. "I'd better go," he mumbled, wincing and rubbing the back of his neck. Tadashi started to bend down to kiss her but changed his mind. "I'll—I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" He straightened up and grabbed his cap from the nearby coffee table, hurrying to the door._

 _"Sure." She paused, biting her lip then blurted out what she wanted to say. "I love you."_

 _Tadashi stopped to regard her before his mouth turned up in a slow smile. He merely nodded and returned her sentiment with a small salute before he left, closing the door behind him with a soft click._

 _The next few days after the incident had been uncomfortable for her, to say the least, because her body seemed determined to make up for lost time._ Lust, that's what it is, _she had thought grimly after she caught herself staring at Tadashi's hands while they studied at the library, wondering how it would feel against her body, touching places he never had before, as he previously mentioned._

 _She couldn't take it anymore. "Why didn't you say anything?" she whispered at him, leaning forward. Come to think of it, he sat across her instead of beside her. She had also barely seen him for the past three days—he said he was helping out at the café, then helping Hiro, then went home early claiming that he needed to catch up on sleep. Was he avoiding her?_

 _Tadashi frowned in confusion. "What do you mean?" he asked warily, as if he sensed where the conversation was going._

 _"Three days ago. After I said I love you. I thought…I mean…" Damn it, this was NOT going well at all._

 _He seemed to understand what she was trying to say and reached across the table to cover her hands with his. He licked his lips nervously, glancing around to make sure nobody was eavesdropping. "Hey," he soothed her, rubbing his thumbs over her knuckles, "you know I love you, right? It was just…" He cleared his throat, his cheeks turning red. "Sorry. I wanted to get out of there before I did or said something stupid. I needed to clear my head because—" he swallowed—"I might lose control."_

 _"Oh." She stared at their entwined hands, the warmth of his skin sending tingles up her arm. "Well," she raised her eyes toward his, shy but determined blue meeting intense brown, "come home with me later tonight, then," she invited, her pulse pounding in her ears. What the heck was she saying? Was she really ready for this sort of thing? Maybe, maybe not, but she'll never know unless she tried, right? She held her breath, waiting for his response._

 _A few moments passed before Tadashi spoke. "Are you sure?" he murmured, his voice low and husky. His grip on her hand tightened ever so slightly._

 _"Yes," she replied with a slight smile and an exhale of relief. "If it's you, then I'm sure."_

She was brought out of her musings by Tadashi getting out of bed. "Where are you going?" she asked, sitting upright. She didn't bother pulling up the sheet to cover herself—what's the use, it's not as if this was the first time they've been intimate. It was actually the sixth time. Their first two times took some getting used to—Elsa wasn't a complete innocent, having had The Talk with her mother when she was thirteen, but the process had turned out to have been more complicated than she thought. Tadashi had been patient, letting her take her time with him and indulging her curiosity, asking her if she was okay and what she wanted from him.

Their third time, as the saying went, was the charm.

He looked back at her and grinned. "Gotta get rid of the condom, then shower. Join me?" He tilted his head toward the direction of her bathroom. Elsa nodded and got out of bed, but not without picking up the clothes that littered the floor.

"What?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

"You are such a neat freak," he replied affectionately, taking the bundle of clothes from her and throwing it into the hamper nearby. "Only you would think of tidying up after what we just did." He looked down at himself, raising an eyebrow. "Huh, would you look at that."

"And you are such a perv," she rolled her eyes, marching past him and into the bathroom. She could feel his gaze burning into her, causing a pleasant shiver to run down her spine. "Well? Are you coming or not?" she prompted, shooting a sultry glance at him over her shoulder.

"Right behind you," he replied with a slow, wolfish smirk as he closed the door behind him.

* * *

Anna's morning routine usually started off with going online to check on her social media accounts. Kristoff, when he had learned of this, only shook his head and shuffled off to prepare breakfast. "But you still love me despite my social media addiction, right?" she had called out after him, not taking her eyes off her tablet.

Today was no different—at least, until she logged on Facebook, in which an invitation from Elsa to be her contact caught her eye. After blinking a few times in slight disbelief, she accepted then proceeded to go over her older sister's Facebook page.

She expected it to be sparse—probably just some pictures or a couple of mundane status updates. Elsa had never been one to share her thoughts. As Anna would playfully complain to Gerda, getting Elsa to talk was like squeezing blood from a stone.

As her eyes traveled down the page, her eyes bugged out. Of all the things she expected Elsa's Facebook page to have, she did not expect this.

"In a relationship with Tadashi Hamada?" she gabbled out after a minute of dropped-jawed incredulity. "Who the heck is Tadashi Hamada?" She grabbed her phone and scrolled through her text messages as she racked her memories if Elsa had ever mentioned him. "Her project partner at SFIT," she muttered, remembering a Skype call that got cut short when Elsa had to hurry to a meeting with him. "Now he's her boyfriend?"

Anna leaned back on her chair, mulling on whether or not she should call Elsa and demand and explanation. I think this calls for a face-to-face meeting—gotta check this Hamada guy out and have a little chat with him, she thought, glancing at her calendar. Holidays were coming up.

* * *

The plane has not yet even landed, but Gerda already felt antsy. Or perhaps unproductive was the right word. She could not remember the last time she had gone on a day without doing any housework—then again, this was her first vacation longer than four days in thirty years.

She had allowed herself to be dragged along by Elsa because her boyfriend Kristoff had been unable to get two weeks off from his job. Boyfriend. How time flies. It seems only yesterday that I was changing their diapers. Then again, they had gone through so much, she brooded. Gerda supposed that was why she had never gone on a long vacation—she couldn't leave them then, but now she could probably rest easy for a little now, since Elsa's of age and Anna can mostly take care of herself.

Even if she forgets to do her laundry sometimes.

Gerda looked out the window to peer at the view below. The plane had just passed San Fransokyo's famous landmark—what was it called again?

"The Golden Torii Bridge," Anna's voice broke into her woolgathering—apparently, she had spoken out loud. She blinked and turned toward her charge. Since Anna was only eighteen, she and Kai were her legal guardians until she turns twenty-one.

"Hmm? What was that, dear?"

"The name of the bridge," Anna clarified, flipping through her guidebook. "Says here the design was inspired by Japanese Shinto archways."

"That's nice," Gerda replied, wondering how long before the plane landed. She wasn't afraid of flying, but there was a slight flutter in stomach that flared up as soon as she had seen the bridge, because it meant she was closer to seeing Elsa once more.

"What time are we landing again?"

"We should be out of the airport by 8AM." Anna grinned. "Oh, I can't wait to see Elsa again! She's gonna flip!"

Gerda frowned. If memory served her right, that meant Elsa was going to be surprised by their arrival, doesn't it? "She knows we're coming, correct?"

"Well…" Anna turned coy and scratched her cheek with her finger. "She does, but I told her to expect us tomorrow. What?" she asked after a beat of disapproving silence, feigning innocence. "It'll be fun to surprise her! She's more than likely to be home today—I asked her what her plans for the week were, and she said that besides studying she'll stay home and clean up—I'm like, 90% sure she won't be changing her plans, you know how much of a stickler she is about schedules. I bet she's been ready for us yesterday, probably checking for dust right now," Anna rolled her eyes affectionately, snickering. "Besides, it's been so long. Way too long," she finished, her voice tapering into a whisper. Gerda reached out and patted her hand to reassure her.

"The past is in the past, Anna," she said firmly. "You and your sister have fixed things, yes? And while I did not approve of what your father did, it was the best he could do at the time."

"I know, I know. Still, it wasn't fair, especially to Elsa. At least now she's happy. Tadashi seems like a good guy, but we'll see. I haven't had the chance to meet him yet, but he seems okay from what Elsa told me."

"That Tadashi fellow—a good…guy?" Gerda echoed, confused. Anna nodded.

"Yeah," she confirmed, drawing the word out uncertainly. "Didn't I tell you? He's her boyfriend."

Gerda's eyes widened. "She never told me that," she said slowly. "How—when did that happen?"

"That is exactly why we're on this trip," Anna replied with a firm bob of her head. "You know Elsa—she never gives the juicy details! When I asked her how she and Tadashi got together, she just said they were friends then he confessed, then they're now together!" She threw up her hands in exasperation. "There has to be more than that, which is why I asked you for Elsa's baby pictures—blackmail material. And I plan on having a little chat with Mr. Hamada," she cackled, rubbing her hands with glee.

"I'm sure he has an interesting story to tell, and if he truly is an honorable young man, he will do so without Elsa's pictures," Gerda remarked with a sage nod.

"Huh. Good point."

"He must be special indeed to have won her heart."

"Oh, Gerda," Anna sighed. "Check this out." She got her tablet out and fiddled with it before handing it to the older woman. "She looks so happy."

 _She does indeed,_ Gerda observed. The pictures Anna showed her were of Elsa and a tall, handsome young man with black hair, warm brown eyes, and a winning smile. He stood behind her with an arm around her waist and the other outstretched forward—she guessed he was holding a selfie stick. Elsa, on the other hand, was absolutely radiant—she had always been beautiful, but sadness hung about her, giving her a melancholy aura. Her smile in this picture reminded Gerda of Elsa's carefree days, the child she had been before she struggled with her unusual abilities.

Love had gilded her with its special magic. Perhaps not just romantic love, as one might think, but love of family and friends. Gerda swiped her finger across the screen to look at more pictures, and she saw one Elsa surrounded by people she assumed to be her friends at school, and another taken on Elsa's last visit to Norway, in which the sisters' arms were wrapped around each other's shoulders.

Gerda nodded to respond to Anna's earlier statement, smiling. _Be happy, Elsa,_ she wished for her former charge, looking out the window once more. _That is all I want for you._

* * *

 _Tadashi planted a trail of kisses down Elsa's graceful, swan-like neck, then along her delicate collarbones, intending for his lips to reach the rosy tips of her breasts. He stopped short of his goal, however, despite her moans of encouragement. He raised himself up to rest his weight on his forearms and gazed down at her, whose platinum blonde hair was spread out over her pillow, her cheeks flushed with desire. He still couldn't believe he was there right now with her—he never thought he had a chance, considering how standoffish she had been, and how leery she was of touching. For him to be with her like this, to let his hands and lips wander so that the feel of her was seared into his memories has got to be the most—the most—_

 _"Hey," Elsa whispered. "What's wrong?" Her eyebrows slightly creased with worry, she ran her fingers through his hair before cradling his jaw, her thumb caressing his cheek. Tadashi leaned into her touch before kissing her palm._

 _"Nothing. Well—just that that, you know, tell me to stop, and I will," he vowed, looking deep into her eyes. "I don't want to hurt you, and I haven't done this enough to—"_

 _"Okay, stop." Elsa placed a finger over his lips. "First, don't talk about other girls. At all. I don't like it. Second, shut up and continue what you were doing. It's you, Tadashi, so I'm sure."_

 _He smiled—it's weird, but hearing her stake her claim over him warmed his heart. Who would have guessed she had such a jealous streak? And knowing that he was her first, well—it was such a rush, too._ Mine, _he thought before opening his mouth to respond. But instead of his voice, a harsh trill filled the room._

What the—?

Tadashi crashed back to reality and found himself being jostled awake by his girlfriend. "Wha—? Elsa, what's—"

"Quick, get dressed, they're here!" Elsa hissed, yanking at his arm to attempt to pull him up. He frowned at the urgency in her voice.

"Who's here?" he grunted, sitting up and scrubbing a hand through his face to wake himself up. Sunlight poured through the nearby window, telling him it was midmorning already.

"Anna and Gerda! They just called to say they're coming up! Herregud, of all the times for Anna to surprise me," Elsa groaned, scrambling to get out of bed to make a beeline to the hamper. She dug his green long-sleeved v-necked t-shirt and jeans out, tossing them at him. "They were supposed to arrive tomorrow! She knows I hate surprises! I swear I'm going to strangle that little—"

His stomach dropped. "Wait—your sister and your nanny?" he asked, dumbfounded and fully awake. Holy crap. This was no way to meet his girlfriend's family!

"Guardian," she bit out, shimmying into a pair of tapered ankle-length black pants. "I mean, former guardian, so…" she trailed off as she pulled on a purple cowl-necked top over her head. "Tadashi! What are you waiting for? Get dressed!" she barked.

"Okay, okay! Where are my boxers?"

The doorbell rang, causing Elsa's pale complexion to turn ashen.

"Pokker," she cursed, wringing her hands.

"You know what, I'll just go commando," Tadashi attempted to joke as he pulled his pants on and carefully zipped up his fly—he remembered watching a comedy that had the main character getting stuck and he didn't want the same thing to happen to him. Just my luck, he thought ruefully as he pulled his shirt on then finger combed his hair, attempting to flatten it to submission.

Why, why, WHY had he dumped his clothes in Elsa's hamper? In hindsight, he should have draped it over the back of a chair or something, but then again he had been quite distracted. _Mental note: girlfriend is a neat freak, so make sure to clean up next time, knucklehead._

Hopefully, there would be a next time. Because if her family finds them like this, there might not be.

The doorbell rang again. "Elsa? Go get the door, I'm decent," Tadashi prompted, pushing her out of her bedroom. She seemed to have blanked out. "It'll be okay, we're good," he soothed her as they walked toward the door. "They won't suspect a thing."

Right. His shirt was a dead giveaway, if the wrinkles were of any indication.

Elsa blinked out of her stupor and gave him a critical once-over. "I hope so," she muttered, picking at an imaginary lint on the right sleeve.

The doorbell rang for the third time. "Ready?" he asked, squeezing her shoulders.

"As I'll ever be. This isn't exactly how I pictured you'd meet my family, I'm sorry. I had been hoping for a dinner. Or something. Anna's going to ask you a lot of questions, just so you'll know." She was mortified, prompting Tadashi to lean his forehead against hers. He cradled her jaw carefully, smoothing his thumbs over her cheeks.

"Hey. You got this. We got this. I have your back." Elsa closed her eyes and breathed in and out before breaking away from him, pasting a welcoming grin on her face. She opened the door.

"Surprise!"

* * *

Considering how things were going swimmingly for her—rebuilding the bond she and Anna had, having a better handle on her powers and anxieties, and getting into a relationship with Tadashi—she could not overcome a lifetime of pessimism. A small voice at the back of her mind kept whispering that it was only a matter of time before things go awry.

The time has come, it seemed.

It had started out innocuously enough. A day after Anna's surprise arrival—she and Gerda had taken a red-eye flight and both were exhausted after the initial excitement had died down—Elsa wanted treat them to dinner when she got home from class. "Oh, no need for that, my dear," Gerda waved her off. "I'm sure you have missed my cooking, have you not? Surely it has been a while since you had a proper Kjøttboller or Fårikål. Invite your young man as well, so we can get to know him better."

There was an undercurrent of steel in former guardian's voice that brooked no disagreement, which left Elsa no choice but to obey, warning bells jangling in her head. She bared a stiff grin and gulped.

"I have a bad feeling about this," she fretted later after she told Tadashi as they headed to their next class.

"Well, I expect to be grilled, especially by your sister," he answered, rubbing his thumb reassuringly against her hand. "I mean, they did almost catch us," he pointed out with a grin.

Elsa grimaced. "Ugh, don't remind me."

"Hey." Tadashi stopped and pulled her aside so they would not obstruct people hurrying to their classes. "Whatever happens, I've got your back. I'm—"

"—not giving up on you," Elsa interrupted, smiling. "I know. Thanks."

He ran a finger down her cheek to tilt her chin up and kissed the tip of her nose. "Better?"

"Yeah."

She really did feel better. What could possibly go wrong? It was nearly impossible that they wouldn't approve of him, since Tadashi was the closest thing to a perfect human being she knew—he was kind, thoughtful, patient, encouraging…

Even if he hogged the blankets sometimes. Good thing the cold never bothered her, anyway.

In hindsight, Elsa wished she hadn't asked that rhetorical question.

What could possibly go wrong, indeed?

* * *

As it turned out, a bored former nanny protective of her former charge can cause quite a situation. For while Elsa was at her classes, Gerda brooded at Elsa's flat as she waited for Anna to get back from grocery shopping. She had wanted to come but Anna demurred, saying she intended to explore the neighborhood before she shopped for ingredients at the supermarket around the corner. "I'll be back by three, I promise. That should give you enough time to prepare and cook dinner. I'll help," she had said.

 _I should have gone with her,_ Gerda thought, flipping through the channels on the TV. _We could have gone shopping first, then let Anna do her exploring while I head back here. Ah, you old woman, you are getting soft with age._ She glanced at the clock on the wall, a whimsical-looking one of a cartoonish snowman, reminding her of Elsa's happier days as a child.

But she is happy now, isn't she?

Gerda's gaze rested on a picture frame that sat on a low cabinet nearby. She stood up from the sofa to pick it up. In the picture were four people—Elsa, Tadashi, a boy of around fourteen, and a woman in her late thirties to early forties. The Golden Torii Bridge loomed behind them. _Tadashi's family?_ she guessed. That must be his brother and mother.

The woman and Elsa had their arms around each other's waists while Tadashi and the boy flanked them. All of them sported grins, but it was Elsa's that captivated her.

 _Family. Elsa found a second family to love her,_ Gerda realized, her eyes welling with glad tears.

Once she was finished staring at the photograph, she decided to soften herself toward Elsa's young man. Admittedly, she didn't know what to think when she first met him. After all, she and Anna had arrived unexpectedly, and it was obvious from the rumpled state of his clothes that he had spent the night at her place—she carefully avoided thinking 'with her'.

Gerda hoped they were studying. It was hard to come to grips that Elsa could be…intimate with Tadashi. She was only starting to get used to Anna having a boyfriend and PERHAPS engaging in acts of that nature. She cringed, remember how awkward her talk with Anna had been. She was no prude, of course—if anything, she had been quite frank. But it was hard, nonetheless, because it meant her girls were grown up.

She had been with them for many years but it was so hard to let them go. She had held them in her arms when they were babies, and enfolded them against her chest as they sobbed their loneliness. They had found each other once more, but they now had someone else to hold and comfort them besides each other and her.

 _There you go, being sentimental again,_ she upbraided herself. _You knew this time would come, at least for Anna. You had been worried for Elsa that it would never come for her. But it did, and it brought her more than what you had hoped for her. Be glad for them._

Shaking off her sudden melancholy, Gerda decided to be productive and do the laundry. She used to do it for the sisters, at least until Elsa left for San Fransokyo and Anna decided to do her own, even if she tended to let it pile up sometimes. Like clockwork, Elsa's hamper sat outside her room on laundry day while Anna's had to be retrieved from her room.

Gerda paused outside Elsa's door, overcome with a sudden hesitation. Was she invading Elsa's privacy, entering her bedroom without permission? _Nonsense,_ she told herself. _I won't be touching anything._ I'll only get her laundry. Nodding to herself, she twisted the doorknob and entered the room.

The room was much smaller than the one Elsa occupied back in Arendelle, of course. Gerda saw that she did not repaint the walls, which were the same beige as in the photo the real estate broker had shown them several months ago. A reprint of Van Gogh's Starry Night adorned the space near the window, which was on the east side of the room. A chair and ottoman sat by the window—Gerda guessed that was where Elsa did her reading. Turning her head, she observed the seven books that rested on the low drawer near her right, titles that Elsa brought from home. _A Collection of Fairy Tales by Hans Christian Andersen,_ Gerda read from the book's spine, smiling faintly in remembrance. Running a finger against the book's spine, she saw in her mind's eye Elsa curled up by the window that dominated Elsa's room back in Arendelle.

Gerda forced herself back to the present and swept her gaze to the bed. _Neat as a pin,_ she noted with pride—even though the sisters were born to wealth, she had made sure to drill them in making their beds when they woke up. Anna did not do so sometimes due to waking up late for school, but Elsa, because of her 'condition' as their parents had put it, had her privately tutored.

A small bedside table with a lamp and alarm clock was on the left side of the bed. _Aha,_ Gerda thought triumphantly, spying Elsa's hamper pushed up against the corner across the door, which was a good spot since it was near the adjacent bathroom. She strode toward the hamper and bent to gather Elsa's laundry.

As she was straightening up, she spotted something black and wadded up underneath Elsa's bed. She dumped the clothes back into the hamper and crouched down to grab it. Her jaw dropped in shock as she held up the thing before her eyes.

It was a pair of lacy black panties.

Gerda's mind spun. _Since when does Elsa wear lingerie?_ she wondered, dumbfounded, staring at the lacy underwear in her hand. _She's never owned such things._

She should know. She has done Elsa's laundry for almost twenty years, until she moved to San Fransokyo as an exchange student. Sinking down onto her former charge's bed, she tried to regroup her thoughts. _If she's now wearing this sort of underwear, then it must mean…_

Gerda tossed the panties aside and sprang back to her feet to dig through the hamper, squelching the thought that she was invading Elsa's privacy—after all, she was bound to find something sooner or later, right? And if she did—

She fished out something gray and unfurled a pair of boxer briefs.

Gerda blinked and released a breath. So. It seems she must fulfill her duty as an older female presence in Elsa's life and impress upon her the importance of protection.

In other words, give her The Talk.

Oh, she was sure that Idun, the girls' mother, had done her duty and spoke to Elsa about the birds and the bees. However, considering how Elsa had grown up, perhaps it was time to revisit that particular topic. Gerda trusted Elsa's judgment—her former charge had a good head on her shoulders, but she didn't know anything about that Tadashi fellow apart from her first impression of him (a nice-looking young man, but that can be deceiving, as Hans had proven). What if—

"Hey Gerda, are you—what the heck!" Anna exclaimed, seemingly appearing out of nowhere. The older woman gave a little shriek and clutched a hand to her heart.

"Oh my goodness, Anna! Do NOT do that!" she admonished her with a glare.

"Yeah, well, can you explain why you're holding a guy's underpants to your chest?" Anna demanded before her gaze was drawn toward the hamper nearby. "Oh my God, are you going through Elsa's literal dirty laundry?"

"What—no!" Gerda defended herself, dropping the incriminating garment back into the hamper. "I was bored and decided to do the laundry, and I just happened to find the thing. It was the last thing I would have expected to find in your sister's laundry, so you can imagine how shocked I was!"

Anna gawked at her guardian, her jaw hanging open. She took in the rest of the scene, stepping closer to the bed and grabbing the panties Gerda had tossed aside earlier. She watched several emotions dance across Anna's face—mostly variations of confusion and disbelief.

"Is this…Elsa's?"

Gerda nodded.

"So, uh…does this mean…?

She nodded again.

"Oh, come on, let's not jump to conclusions, this is, like, circumstantial evidence. I'm sure there's a logical explanation for this." Anna blinked and shook her head. "Right?"

"Like what? And speaking of which, I trust you, Anna. I'd better not find Mr. Bjorgman's unmentionables in your laundry, is that clear?"

"E-excuse me?" Anna sputtered. "I can't believe you busted out the 'Mister' bit! Kristoff wouldn't—"

"You heard me. What you do with Mr. Bjorgman is none of my business, but it does when it involves your parents' roof, is that understood?" At the back of her mind, Gerda was aware of how the situation had taken a turn for the absurd. She had only wanted to do the laundry—how did it end up on her girls' sex lives?

 _This vacation is not turning out to be what I expected._ Gerda rubbed her suddenly throbbing temples with a quiet sigh. She tried for a more conciliatory tone toward her charge. "Anna," she began, "just remember to protect yourself, alright? I don't want anything to happen to you."

"And if something does, Kristoff will be there for me," Anna declared staunchly. "He won't leave me."

"Of that, I am sure, but indulge this old nanny of yours and promise me that you will do what you can to protect yourself from…unforeseen circumstances, please?"

Anna visibly relaxed. "You know I will Gerda," she assured her. "You know me, I want the whole shebang—courtship, romance, a wedding with the works, a family of my own. So I'm going to do things right and proper." She frowned. "Well, maybe not too proper, it's a bit late for that," she amended then caught sight of Gerda's raised eyebrow. "Ooh, too much info, huh?"

"Yes."

"Well, that's just about the most info I'll share with you about my business with Kristoff, anyway. Unless you've got some tips to share?" Anna wiggled her eyebrows suggestively with a wide grin.

 _Oh, two can play at that game._ "Just lie back," Gerda deadpanned, trying not to laugh as Anna's jaw dropped open. "What? You asked, I answered. Besides, I'm not finished," she said with a raised finger, forestalling the younger woman who closed her mouth and waited expectantly.

"Well?" Anna prompted after a few moments. "I await your wisdom with bated breath, my dear old nanny."

"So impatient. As I was saying," Gerda paused for effect, "just lie back. If he loves you, and you trust him, it will be magic. At least, most of the time, so try to switch things up a bit. Experiment and communicate," she remarked with a completely straight face, but her lip twitching almost gave her away as Anna stared at her in bewilderment. She cleared her throat to compose herself. "Love, trust, and honesty—those are the words of wisdom I shall impart to you, my dear little one."

Anna tilted her head pensively in response. "You know, that's what I saw between you and Kai. I mean, it's not like you guys were 'lovey-dovey'," she made quotation marks with her fingers, "but you two can communicate with a look. And that's something I want for me and Kristoff, too."

Gerda coughed into her fist, abashed that Anna had seen as much. "You're quite welcome. Now," she pluked Elsa's lingerie still clutched in Anna's hand and threw it into the hamper. "Excuse me while I do the laundry. I think the two of us need to talk to Elsa."

"Talk to me about what?" a voice spoke from the doorway, causing Anna to spin around in surprise.

"Elsa! You're back!"

* * *

By the time it occurred to her, Elsa had already entered her apartment and was slipping her new brown loafers off. _Mental note: remind Anna to lock up from the inside._ San Fransokyo was by and large a safe place, but being a little extra cautious wouldn't hurt anyone.

She heard the sound of Gerda and Anna's voices coming from her bedroom and frowned—she couldn't make out what they were saying, but then why were they there in the first place?

"I think the two of us need to talk to Elsa," Gerda was saying as she approached her open bedroom door.

Those were never good words to hear.

"Talk to me about what?" Elsa asked, keeping her features smooth even as she felt the familiar yet unwelcome tide of anxiety slowly starting to rise within her. Her sudden appearance made her sister start and spin around toward her in surprise.

"Elsa, you're back!" Anna exclaimed squeakily. Her tone raised Elsa's suspicions that something was amiss. Scanning her surroundings, Elsa noticed the hamper before Gerda, who sat on her bed and whose features were unreadable. In a flash, Elsa understood what happened.

They have been going through her literal dirty laundry.

Her eyes narrowed and her brows drew together ominously. "Why are you going through my laundry?" she asked, her voice low and deceptively calm.

"I—I'm not! But Elsa—"

She cut Anna off with a wave of her hand. "I can't believe this—are you spying on me?" she accused them, her voice rising in anger. _Unbelievable,_ she fumed, struggling to keep the ice within her contained. Were they snooping because of what they saw when they arrived? If so, why couldn't they have just asked? Sure, it would be difficult and embarrassing for her, but she wouldn't lie about her relationship with Tadashi. And if they did not approved, she was prepared to fight tooth and nail for him. _For us,_ she amended silently. She had been bracing herself for some kind of confrontation over Tadashi, but not this—an invasion of her privacy.

"Enough." Gerda pinned Elsa with a glare of her own. Elsa forced herself to tamp down on her anger—losing control was never a good thing, and her old nanny's quelling look was as effective as it was when she was seven. "Anna had nothing to do with this. She found me in her room with your laundry. That's all."

Her admission caused her earlier embarrassment and anger to flare up once more. "What were you thinking, Gerda? Why would you do something like this?" Elsa asked, her anger giving way to feelings of betrayal. How could she think of her like that? And for her to resort to—

"Spying on you was never my intention, Elsa. Surely you know me better than that." Elsa heard the censure behind Gerda's serene tone and expression. "And you know I am a creature of habit—Wednesday is laundry day for me, whether I am in America or Norway. I only thought to do yours since I don't have any of mine or Anna's to do," she explained.

"You didn't have to do that," Elsa muttered, ducking her head and abashed over her outburst. "You're my guests. Guests don't do housework."

"Of course they do. But you're right, I overstepped my bounds. I'm sorry, Elsa." She glanced up in surprise, catching the older woman's wistful gaze. Gerda motioned for the sisters to sit with her on the bed and sighed.

"I keep forgetting you girls are grown up and are starting to live your lives. Just a few years ago my world revolved around you both. But then you moved here and Anna to Oslo—I found myself at odds and ends. And now, both of you each have a special young man." She trailed off, appearing to gather her thoughts. "I suppose that makes me both happy and worried over you two—I'm sure that your young men are both honorable and would cherish and love you, but as I've told Anna, please reassure this old woman that you will do what is necessary and protect yourself from anything…unexpected, Elsa."

Gerda's last few words caused a furious blush to creep up Elsa's neck and suffuse her face. She glared at the grinning Anna.

 _Well, now they know._ Elsa took a deep breath to collect herself and nodded. "I will," she promised.

"Good. Now what I'd like to know from the both of you is, do you use a condom, take pills, or use both?" Gerda asked bluntly.

 _Oh my God._ Elsa wanted to sink to the floor and disappear. Or maybe build an igloo and shut herself up in there until her humiliation goes away. Perhaps Anna would like to join her too, judging from the way her sister's face resembled a tomato.

Gathering the shreds of her dignity, Elsa cleared her throat and answered with her face as straight as possible. "I've actually got an appointment on Friday with my doctor to, uh…discuss further options in…you know." She licked her lips. "That's why I can't take you to the San Fransokyo Aquarium. But Tadashi will. He volunteered, actually. His Aunt Cass will, too. She's eager to meet you both."

"Aunt?" Anna echoed, speaking for the first time since Elsa's outburst.

"Yeah. His parents died in a car accident. Tadashi and his younger brother Hiro live with her." Elsa flicked an assessing glance at Anna, who returned it warily. "You know," she said after a pause, "you haven't answered Gerda's question. Are you trying to weasel your way out of it?"

"Am not," Anna retorted. "If you really want to know, Kristoff and I use both, okay? I mean, he uses a condom, I'm on the Pill. Double protection. Geez," she huffed.

"Good." Gerda stood up. "You have informed Mr. Hamada about dinner later with us, haven't you?"

"Ooh, there she goes with the 'Mister'," Anna muttered under her breath. "This ought to be fun."

Elsa ignored Anna. "He'll be here at seven."

"Excellent. Now come and help me prepare dinner. I'll do the laundry later. We'll talk more as we do."

* * *

Call her silly, but Anna never thought she would have the chance to talk about guys with Elsa with the way they had grown up, and her older sister's seeming uninterest in the opposite sex. Things between them were better than ever—they made sure to chat at least ten minutes a day during weekdays, or do a video call on weekends to catch up on what's going on with each other. Elsa knew about Kristoff, of course, and had listened patiently as she nattered on about him—even grinned and nodded in appreciation when she showed her a picture of him shirtless. But Elsa talking about someone she liked? That had never happened, at least until she learned about Tadashi.

Elsa with a boyfriend. Huh.

"What?" Elsa asked, still focused on her task of rolling the ground meat into balls.

"Nothing. Well—not really. I mean—how—or maybe, um…what did you like about Tadashi? You guys were friends at first, right? Then it just—happened?" Anna rambled as she sliced the mushrooms for the potato mushroom bake. She didn't want to pry too much because Elsa might clam up. While things were so much better between them, Anna knew old habits die hard as proven by how upset Elsa was over Underweargate (as Anna had dubbed the earlier fiasco in her head).

"He's uh…" Elsa bit her lip and continued with her task, rolling up the last bit of meat and handing them over to Gerda to cook before answering Anna. "I'm not exactly sure what he saw in me, but I liked how he accepted me for what I am," she mumbled, washing her hands. "He's patient and kind and he's such a dork—I caught him dancing one time while he was working on our project. He must have thought he was alone," she giggled then paused for a moment. "I tried to stay away like I did with you, but he was relentless. And I guess…it was easier to let him in because I'm far from the things that reminded me about the accident." She shook her head, grimacing. "Wait, that came out wrong, I didn't mean—"

"No, no, I understand!" Anna hastened to reassure her, waving the hand that held the knife. "Sometimes we just have to step back, you know?"

"I didn't just step back from you, Anna. I ran away from you. And will you please watch it with that knife before you maim someone?"

"Sorry. Well, let's just say you needed to step back thousands of miles away from me, but I have you back now, right?"

Elsa let out a quiet chuckle tinged with regret. "Thirteen years and thousands of miles. How can I ever make it up to you, Anna?"

She let out a growl of frustration and put the knife away, grabbing Elsa's hands in hers. "You can start by not wallowing in guilt anymore," she pointed out. "I saw your pictures on Facebook—you looked so happy! You're surrounded by friends and family—yeah, family," Anna repeated. "You're part of Tadashi's family now."

"I am?"

"Ugh, for all your smarts, you can be so obtuse sometimes." Anna rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, well…that's another thing bothering me. Should I go back with you to Norway? Because—"

"No."

"But—"

Anna wanted to bang her head against the counter. "We've got the rest of our lives to make up for lost time," she said, mustering all her patience. "So that means we can let other people in, too. And you have, which makes me so happy for you. I also did—Kristoff's family is my family now, and when you go back home, I'd love for you to meet them, okay?"

Elsa regarded her with piercing blue eyes and nodded. "Good," Anna declared. "So uh…do you have any shirtless pictures of Tadashi?" she hedged after a few seconds.

Her sister scowled. "Are you telling me that you want to ogle MY boyfriend?" she glowered.

Anna gaped then guffawed at Elsa's sudden jealous snit. "Oh man, are you jealous? You should have seen your face!" she gasped.

"Girls," Gerda called out. "Are the mushrooms and potatoes done?"

"Oh yeah, just about, hang on." She ignored Elsa's baleful stare as she got back to chopping the rest of the mushrooms, her shoulders still shaking from mirth. "Oh, stop it," she admonished Elsa. "You know how crazy I am over Kristoff. I like 'em big and wide." She shot her sister a sidelong look. "Shoulders, I meant shoulders! Geez, get your mind out of the gutter," she huffed, trying to keep from laughing over Elsa's scandalized face. She wanted to say more, but a snowball to the face quickly shut her up.

"No fair!"

"All's fair in love and war, sis, didn't you know?" Elsa smirked and conjured up another snowball with one hand. Anna could see Gerda behind Elsa shaking her head over the sisters' antics.

"I swear, you two…"

* * *

"That was an excellent meal, Mrs. Solberg," Tadashi remarked with an appreciative grin. "Thank you for inviting me for dinner."

"It was my pleasure, Tadashi," Gerda returned with a nod of her head. "Kjøttboller is one of Elsa's favorites."

"Is it?" He glanced at Elsa. "I'll have to cook it for you when you come over for dinner, then."

Elsa raised a dubious eyebrow at him. "If your toast is any indication of your culinary abilities, I'll have to pass, thanks." She hid a smile behind her wineglass, her eyes dancing with amusement.

Tadashi let out an exaggerated sigh. "See what I have to put up with?" he complained to Anna. "Your sister is such a heartbreaker. It took forever to get her to date me." He pouted at Elsa, giving her a puppy-eyed look.

"But she's worth it, right?" Her sister's boyfriend won her over with his easygoing charm and honesty—she grilled him as best she could, interrogating him over how he felt about Elsa, causing the subject of their conversation to hide her face in her hands. She had watched him intently over dinner, looking for signs of insincerity, but couldn't find any. Actions did speak louder than words—he kept leaning toward Elsa, his entire face lighting up when he smiles at Elsa, his eyes roaming all over Elsa's face as if he couldn't get enough of her. _I bet they're holding hands under the table,_ she mused, leaning over to rest her chin on one hand.

Tadashi's gaze remained locked on Elsa's, fondness replacing his pout when she put her wineglass down on the table and made noises about helping Gerda clean up. His eyes tracked her as she made her way to the kitchen.

"Oh, yeah," he agreed softly. "Totally worth it."


	13. Another Lifetime - Part 1

The young man leaned against the ship's railing, enjoying how the wind ruffled his hair. He had it cut short in the Western style a week ago by the ship's barber. _It certainly feels cooler and lighter,_ he mused, running a hand through his hair before rubbing the back of his neck, remembering he no longer had a high ponytail to tug on when he felt apprehension. It seemed he will have to adopt a new nervous tic, then.

To say he was nervous was an understatement. He was terrified. But he was a Hamada, and as samurai, do not show fear.

He was sent by the by the Emperor to be his country's ambassador to Arendelle, which, up until three years ago, was mostly closed off from most of its neighbors. It was for that reason that the Emperor decided to do so, because Arendelle seemed to be the most trustworthy out of all the Western nations. He was duty-bound to follow even though he had serious doubt about the Emperor's reasoning—isolation did not mean trustworthiness (he couldn't figure out how the Emperor made that leap of logic). Much as he wanted to refuse—for who would look after his younger brother Hiro?—he could not. Accepting this post was his payment to the Emperor for granting him a scholarship that allowed him to study abroad and indulge his interest in Western innovations. However, that also meant that whatever he had learned will be put into some use, and for the Emperor, it meant sending him to Arendelle—never mind that he was only twenty-three and quite untested at that.

He suspected he was "honored" by the Emperor because none of his sempai—seniors—wished to be stationed so far away from home. Arendelle may as well be at the end of the world. _Or on top,_ he amended, since he had learned that the world is round and not flat.

The young man sighed and pulled his haori closer when the wind grew stronger. Perhaps it was time to change out of his homeland's clothing and into something more suited for his destination, for the wind brought with it the remaining winter chill. He wished he could recall a suitable poem by Bashō to match his unsettled mood, but the only one that came to mind was:

Speaking out  
My lips are cold  
In the autumn wind.

It was spring.

By Western reckoning, today was March 13th in the year 1843. He was two days away from his destination and guessed the ship had just passed the Southern Isles, a tumultuous kingdom of thirteen princes, the youngest of which had almost usurped Arendelle's throne had he been successful in eliminating its queen and princess. Resting a day after his arrival, he will start his first order of business—to attend the queen's spring ball.

"Hey Tadashi, aren't you going to sleep yet?" a heavy hand landed on his shoulder, causing him to stagger and wince a bit.

"Maybe a little later, Wasabi," he answered with a slight grin, resisting the urge to rub his shoulder.

His burly friend made an annoyed noise. "I spill wasabi on my shirt one time," he muttered as he headed back to his cabin. Tadashi chuckled and released a breath. At least even before he disembarked, he had already made friends. He won't be alone. And they are quite a diverse bunch, too. He looked forward to getting to know them better soon.

Speaking of which, he really should get some sleep. He had early morning refresher dancing lessons with Frederick—Fred, as he had insisted to be called—and Tadashi had a feeling lessons with him would be quite interesting.

* * *

Tadashi felt the apprehension he had felt on the ship return a hundredfold as he glanced around the…what is it called? Ballroom? He couldn't understand why the room was called as such, because not a ball was in sight. Then again, he was at a ball, which was about to start, so…

This foreign language was funny—he had since given up trying to understand its puzzling rules and just followed them.

The young ambassador stuck a finger down his collar to loosen his cravat a bit. _Kuso,_ he grumbled inwardly. _I don't see its purpose, unless it is intended to choke the wearer!_ He had asked Fred what the thing was for, but his friend simply shrugged and said, "They say it's to hide a dirty shirt. Works for me, though!"

 _Fresh air might do the trick._ He nodded then headed toward the nearest door that provided an exit, which led out to the castle courtyard. Tadashi wandered aimlessly, telling himself that he will head back into the ballroom after about ten or fifteen minutes. He wished the hall had led out to a garden so he could do a bit of Zen meditation to center himself.

But the sound of shallow, anxious breathing caught his attention. He tilted his head and followed the sound, which led him toward a column where he spotted pale blonde hair standing out against the shadows. Squinting against the darkness, he made out the hunched figure of a distressed young woman, who had her hands clasped over her chest as she gulped for air.

Tadashi did not wish to startle her, so he kept his distance, making sure he could be seen clearly. It was good that the moon was full and bright, shining its light throughout the castle courtyard.

"Ano…sumimasen—I mean, excuse me, are you alright?" he asked, peering into the darkness as he held out a hand. The pale blonde head jerked up and turned toward his direction, and he was taken a bit aback by the bright blue eyes that blinked back at him.

"Wh—what are you doing here?" the young woman demanded, stepping back warily. "D—don't come any closer. Please, just—stay back."

Tadashi blinked. _A bit of an overreaction, isn't it?_ He cleared his throat and dismissed the uncharitable thought. She was obviously troubled, but he couldn't just stand by and do nothing. "I mean you no harm," he responded, holding his palms up to show his sincerity. "I just want to help. Tell me how I can do that for you."

She laughed, but it was far from a happy sound. "If you can call off the ball, that would be wonderful." Tadashi furrowed his brow in confusion. If what he read about Western customs was correct, ladies loved going to balls, didn't they? This one was quite unusual.

"Well, the queen can do that, right?" he said before he winced. What an inane answer. But it seemed to be the right one, because the quiet giggle that followed sounded a little happier.

"I suppose," she answered, shaking her head. "I'm sorry. I just…I don't like balls that much," she admitted. She didn't step out from the shadows, but there was enough light for him to see her clearly now.

She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

Tadashi felt himself stand straighter. Now that she was calmer, her bearing changed. She seemed more regal, her chin tilted up that showed a façade of quiet confidence. Had he not witnessed her anxious episode earlier, he never would have guessed that she was agitated over the thought of attending the ball.

It was as if a mask had slipped into place.

"Are you…alright now?" he ventured, raising his eyebrows. She nodded.

"I'll be fine. I think I'll need a few more minutes before I head in," she answered, deflating a bit once more. She rubbed her right arm with her left hand, looking away from him as if from embarrassment."You don't need to wait for me, sir. I'll be fine."

Tadashi shook his head. "I would feel much better if I didn't leave you alone out here," he said. "Take all the time you need."

A moment passed before she let out a sharp breath then squared her shoulders. "Then, I'm fine and going back in," she declared, her mouth set in a determined line.

A cold breeze picked up, swirling around her before passing through him, which made him shiver despite the coat he wore. Clenching his jaw to avoid showing such weakness, he held out a hand. "May I escort you back in, my lady?" he asked, remembering his manners.

She glanced at his hand with uncertainty before darting her gaze up at him. "I…yes. Of course." She slowly reached out and he felt a jolt travel up his arm when her cool skin came into contact with his. Guiding her out of the shadows, Tadashi tucked her hand within the crook of his arm, smiling slightly.

"Everything alright?" he murmured.

"Yes. Let's head back in."

The pair was silent as they walked back toward the castle and into the hallway that led to the ballroom. Tadashi snuck a glance the young woman on his arm. Now that there were no shadows she could hide behind, he was struck once more by her loveliness. _Yuki-onna,_ he realized. Snow woman in his native tongue. No, she definitely was not the ruthless spirit folklore had described, but her features reminded him of winter's pale, ethereal beauty.

"Thank you for your assistance," she said, withdrawing her hand from the crook of his arm when they spotted a portly gentleman by the door. A flash of relief crossed his face when he saw them and he hurried over.

Sensing he was no longer needed, Tadashi nodded toward her. "I hope to see you inside to further our acquaintance, my lady," he said politely. She gave him a slight smile and nodded back at him before she focused her attention on the portly gentleman, walking away from him.

Sparing her a last glance over his shoulder, Tadashi straightened his lapels and opened the door, determined to do his duty as his country's ambassador to Arendelle.

* * *

"Your Majesty, may I present Lord Tadashi of the Hamada clan, from the Far East," the portly gentleman from earlier intoned. Tadashi racked his mind for the next thing to do—damn these Western customs! He knew he should bow, but how should the bow be executed? It certainly wasn't how he would do it back home, where people bow with their backs straight, legs together, and the angle depending on each person's social status. Here in the West, men were supposed to 'bow and scrape' where the man's right foot scrapes the ground when he draws it back as he bends gracefully, a hand over his chest.

 _Move, Hamada!_

He was sure he did it clumsily. If his brother Hiro were here, he'd be muttering "dishonor on you, dishonor on your cow" under his breath. It was an inside joke between them.

Tadashi didn't really know what to expect in meeting her. He had heard rumors about her—wild ones, like her literally freezing a man with just a look, but he considered himself a logical man, dismissing them. Earlier, when she and her sister Princess Anna were announced, he was at the back of the crowd and was unable to get a good look. But as he straightened, it took all of the self-discipline he had not to let his jaw drop as he beheld Queen Elsa of Arendelle.

It was the young woman from before. _Yuki…_ he thought, his eyes going wide. He wasn't aware he had spoken out loud though, because the young woman—Queen Elsa—raised her eyebrows then tilted her head, regarding him curiously. "Yuki?" she repeated.

The ambassador fought down a blush and cleared his throat. "I…my apologies, Your Majesty. I just—well—yuki, it, ah, means snow in my native language," he stammered before realizing how gauche he was acting. Did he just compare his host to snow?

Tadashi wished the ground would open up and swallow him whole. Or for someone to hand him a dagger so he could commit ritual suicide.

 _Seppuku is a bit too much,_ he amended, seeing the queen's mouth twitch into a small, understanding smile. "That's very interesting, Lord Tadashi," she remarked.

"One more nickname to add to the list, huh?" a redheaded young woman beside the Queen said, grinning.

"Nickname?" Tadashi echoed.

"I'm Princess Anna," the brash redhead said, still smiling. "Queen Elsa is known around here as the Snow Queen."

"Ah." He nodded as if he knew what the princess was talking about.

An awkward silence blanketed the three of them. Tadashi started to raise his hand so he could rub the back of his neck, but remembered he was in the presence of a queen. Remembering what had been drilled into him before he left home, he bowed stiffly and held out his hand.

"Will you give me the pleasure of dancing with you, Your Majesty?"

"She'd love to!"

"Wh—Anna!" The mask slipped, revealing the distressed young woman from earlier.

"If Your Majesty—"

"No! I mean—" Queen Elsa took a breath to compose herself. "My apologies for the confusion, Lord Tadashi. Of course I would be honored to dance with you." He didn't miss the pointed glare the queen sent to the princess, who just smiled guilelessly.

The band struck up a stately polonaise after the dancers took their places on the dance floor. Tadashi was thankful for the slow tempo of the dance—had it been the galop or the mazurka, he…well, he definitely wouldn't have done his country any favors if he accidentally stepped on the queen's foot.

Or worse.

"I'm sorry for putting you on the spot earlier," he apologized when they started dancing. Part of his brain was working furiously to make sure he was keeping the rhythm properly.

"What for?" Queen Elsa asked, surprised.

"This is all so new to me," Tadashi admitted. "I think I may have broken some rules of etiquette in asking a queen to dance. I'm not sure, there are so many rules." He let out a self-deprecating chuckle. "I'm hardly fit to be my country's representative."

It was a good thing he possessed excellent reflexes, because out of the corner of his eye he spotted the man next to him getting ready to twirl his partner around. Hastily, he did the same, and breathed a mental sigh of relief he was able to pull it off.

When Queen Elsa got back into position, he found her giving him sympathetic smile. "Don't worry about it," she assured him. "I'm the queen. What I say goes, and I say right now—dancing with me is not a breach of etiquette."

"That's a relief."

"Besides," she continued, "you helped me earlier. I'm not very comfortable around crowds and—" he had to twirl her again, and this time the music stopped just as they faced each other, his right and left hands clasped.

The queen blinked.

"Yes?" he prompted, very curious as to what she was about to impart.

"Well, being touched."

"Oh." With that he stepped back, letting go and bowing at the waist as Western manners dictated. He found the mask firmly back over her face, but her eyes held a look of uncertainty, as if apologizing for what she had revealed to him.

A flash of insight came to him. _We're the same,_ he realized. _Both of us doing something we are forced to, both of us in roles we do not want because of duty._

Tadashi wished he had more time with Queen Elsa, so he could tell her in some way that he understood her. And perhaps get to know her better—he wanted to know who she truly was. She had shown him two different facets of herself tonight that he found himself quite intrigued by her. Will there be another chance such as this?

Maybe not. He was a mere ambassador, and she, a queen. Time will come he will be called home once this duty is over. Back home, he had other duties to fulfill. To stay in Arendelle because of a supposed connection with her is preposterous, and yet...

 _I will find some way to make it happen,_ he vowed, staring after her as she walked back toward the dais to join her sister. _If not in this lifetime…perhaps in the next._


	14. Another Lifetime - Part 2

"Hey Elsa, don't you think it's time for you to take a break?" Anna's voice broke through the monotony of the trade agreement Elsa was reading. Trying to read, actually, because she had been stuck on that paragraph for the past—she darted a glance at the nearby mantel clock—ten minutes. Elsa let out a soft sigh of defeat and met her younger sister's hopeful gaze, pushing up the glasses perched on her nose.

"You always say that when you want something from me. Come on, what is it?" she prompted, adopting a mock-weary tone as she steepled her fingers and leveled an even look at Anna. Her lip twitched from behind her fingers at the other's affronted expression. "Let me guess—there's a dress you've been dying to wear for Kristoff, but you need my expert advice because I've got an impeccable sense of style and the dress just has to be ABSOLUTELY perfect. It has to be so because your anniversary is coming up, yes?"

"How did you—"

"I have a calendar. The year passed rather quickly, didn't it?"

Anna's eyes softened in fond remembrance. "Yes, it has. And I couldn't be any happier, Elsa." She smiled and clasped her hands over her heart. "Thank you for backing me when the council objected."

"Kristoff is a fine man. You are happy with him," Elsa said simply. "That's enough reason for me to agree to your marriage and give you my full support."

"So, I'm very happy, which is why—" Anna went around her older sister's great oak desk, hauling her to her feet. "You are coming with me now. Right now. So you can tell me that the dress is perfect—"

"And to pay for it."

"Yes, that too. Wait, what?"

Elsa chuckled. "Just promise me something good will come out of it. Say, a niece or nephew after nine months?" she replied archly, raising a sly, teasing eyebrow.

"We're working on it," Anna shot back without missing a beat, herding Elsa out of her study by pushing her shoulders. At the back of her mind she acknowledged that perhaps she was due for a break, because otherwise she would have dug her heels in and refused to go.

"So I heard. Literally, I might add." Elsa tossed a wry comment over her shoulder, observing with amusement at how redness bloomed on Anna's cheeks. She kept her expression bland. "Now, if only you could show the same passion and dedication in translating the—"

"Coronian trade agreement, I know, I know, alright?" her younger sister rolled her eyes and grabbed Elsa's hand to resume their trek along the hall toward the spiraling staircase that led to the main hall of the castle. "Don't let me meet whoever wrote that darn thing. I might strangle him."

"Her."

"Huh?" Anna stopped short and looked back at her.

"The writer of the Coronian agreement. Constance Fitzherbert. No relation to Prince Eugene, I believe," Elsa clarified.

"You know who wrote it?"

"It's written at the bottom of the title page."

"Oh, right. Guess I got too excited and dived right in." Anna's expression turned sheepish and looped her arm around Elsa's. "I mean, that was my first 'helping you govern Arendelle' thing and I didn't want to mess it up, you know?" This time her frenetic pace slowed down as she prattled on about the long-windedness of the trade agreement. Elsa had decided to assign that particular duty to Anna because of her proficiency at languages—besides, Elsa's German was rather abysmal, and Anna did say she wanted a more active role in Arendelle's affairs. And it was high time Anna had a hand in running the country, if her child were to become the heir to the throne. A curiously warm feeling settled around Elsa's heart—it took her a minute to recognize that it was a contented sort of happiness, different from the giddy one she experienced the moment she reconciled with Anna.

Elsa still pinched herself sometimes, though. The thirteen years of isolation left an indelible mark on her that she had a hard time believing in good things, even if they unfolded right before her eyes. Anna's wedding to Kristoff, for example. She knew it was such an absurd thought, but she half-expected the chandelier to fall on them in the middle of their first dance as a married couple. But the glow surrounding Anna as she walked down the aisle and Kristoff's eyes round with wonder had been worth risking the council's wrath.

However, remembering the council's objections soured Elsa's reminiscences, for they had brought up the issue of her heir, which she dreaded. She was well-aware of that particular duty—in fact, when she was sixteen, she had asked her father why no marriage had been arranged for her yet. The idea of being married to someone terrified her, because what if she hurt her husband somehow—just look at what she did to Anna, and she was her sister!—but she had been such a disappointment when it came to controlling her powers. The least she could do was to be perfect in fulfilling her duties as future queen.

And perhaps she had also gotten used to being untouched. Marriage was—

Elsa had swallowed back feelings of vague revulsion as she remembered what her mother told her about marital duties. She could not imagine being THAT intimate with anyone. But honestly, the physical aspect of marriage did not compare to the uneasiness she felt over the idea that she had to form a relationship with her husband. Because of her powers, she barely had one with Anna—how can she be expected to have one with whom she was not related to?

Being alone was easier. She was used to it, after all, and to change that…

It scared her.

Her father had regarded her with solemn eyes, as if he divined her thoughts. "You don't need to worry about that now, dearest," he said, reaching out to reassure her. But she must have flinched out of instinct, because his hand fell to his side in defeat. Remorse etched itself between his brows as he clenched his jaw.

The matter had never resolved, however. If her parents had any plans to marry her off, it never came to fruition, for two years later, they were lost at sea. Of course, the council had broached the subject of getting her betrothed to eligible princes of neighboring countries, thankfully excepting the Southern Isles, but with Anna and Kristoff's desire to marry, she was able to hold that off—at least, until she declared her intention to make her possible nephew or niece her heir. She knew her duty, but she had enough of being a damn martyr. Elsa will pursue her happiness, and her happiness did not include marrying a complete stranger just so she could produce an heir. She supposed she got used to being alone, and besides, Anna shared her blood; her offspring will be Elsa's heir.

At least, she was sure of that, until three months ago.

No, she had not fallen in love at first sight, of that she was sure. It was just one encounter and one dance. She had danced a few more times after that—a waltz with Kristoff, a polka with Prince Eugene of Corona, a mazurka with a lord from one of Arendelle's provinces, and a quadrille. One dance with him should not have mattered much. But she had met his gaze from across the dance floor thrice, and she couldn't deny the pull she felt toward exotic foreigner from the Far East—she was certain her head would not be turned by a beautiful stranger, but a connection made in the shadows of the castle courtyard, a spark of understanding in almond-shaped brown eyes, warm hands enveloping her own…

"Elsa? Are you even listening to me?" A note of exasperation colored Anna's tone.

"Of course I was. You were saying that the legalese was a headache to translate and that Corona should just spit out what it is trying to swindle out of Arendelle," she paraphrased. Elsa had perfected the art of listening with half an ear a long time ago—coupled with the skill of a serene poker face, she managed to brood during council meetings.

However, Anna was more perceptive than the council, squinting at her with a suspicious stare. "You're off in your own little world again," she accused. Elsa tamped down on the mild irritation that arose within her, for now was not the time to squabble with Anna. They were at the castle gates now, which opened to let the royal sisters out.

"Old habits die hard, I suppose." Elsa turned away and raised a hand to stop an approaching guard, who was about to off his services to escort them in town. The guard, Bjorn, if her memory served her right, bowed then snapped a crisp salute before going back to his place. "By the way, where *is* your husband? I would think that with your anniversary tomorrow he'd at least accompany us," Elsa remarked after a few minutes of walking silently. She noted that they had already arrived at the square, where a few stalls were selling flowers and various knickknacks stood. Oaken spotted them and called out a cheerful "Hoo-hoo!", wiggling his finger at them in greeting.

"He said he's working on my surprise and went up to his cabin in the mountains with Sven," Anna explained after returning the burly shopkeeper's greeting with a wave of her own. "Which is good because I can work on my surprise for him. Come on, we need to get to Madame Fournier's shop!" She broke into a run, grabbing Elsa's hand to drag her along.

"Wh—Anna, wait! Slow down before—oof!" Elsa grunted as she smacked against something warm and solid. The impact loosened Anna's grip on her hand, causing Elsa to stagger sideways as she flailed to regain her balance. A slightly raspy baritone exclaimed a foreign-sounding oath just as she fell to the ground.

"Shimatta!"

"Daijoubu desu ka, Hamada—"

"Hai, hai, daijoubu desu, Gogo." Elsa followed the voice, and her blue eyes widened when she recognized the brown ones she beheld.

"Hey, why don't you watch where you're going?" Anna snapped, grabbing Elsa's hand to help her up.

"I could say the same for you," a curt, accented female voice retorted back. "This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't been dragging your companion around."

"Gogo, please," Ambassador Hamada finally spoke up, laying a hand on the petite young woman's shoulder. "My apologies, Your Majesty, Your Highness," he apologized, bowing stiffly at the waist. The young woman with him glanced at her and Anna before following suit. Elsa couldn't help but notice what the young woman wore—a yellow robe-like dress with a very wide purple sash spanning her middle. On the other hand, Ambassador Hamada's garments were nothing out of the ordinary—a blue coat over a white shirt, a dark gray cravat, and black trousers. However, their dark hair and eyes still marked them as foreigners.

Elsa blinked and shook her head. "I lay the blame squarely on Princess Anna's shoulders," she replied, giving her a reproachful look. "She should not have been running around like a hoyden in the first place."

Anna rolled her eyes and let out an unladylike snort. "Hoyden? Really? But yes, I'm sorry for that, Ambassador, because there's something I REALLY want to show my sister, so if you'll excuse us, we have to go. Bye!" She looped an arm around Elsa's and darted off once more, causing Elsa to yelp in surprise. She shot the ambassador an embarrassed grin, who responded with an amused, commiserating one of his own. _Siblings,_ his eyes seemed to say, as he raised his hand to bid them goodbye.

There was that spark again, Elsa realized as she turned away to lecture Anna on propriety a princess must observe in public. Squabbling with Anna was a good way to keep herself from examining the strange feelings he stirred within her too closely. Strange, because she both wanted to run away and stay by his side.

 _There would be another time to sort these feelings out,_ she resolved fifteen minutes later, nodding her approval at Anna's choice. She stood behind Anna, hands resting on her shoulders as she scrutinized the dress.

"Do you think Kristoff will love it?" Anna asked.

"He will, trust me. Honestly, Anna. It wouldn't matter if you wore sackcloth for your anniversary."

Anna smiled and smoothed the skirt, looking at herself in the mirror. "Say, Elsa," she began after a few moments. "Are you sure about your decision? About not getting married, I mean." Her tone was carefully neutral.

"My thoughts regarding the matter are final, Anna. You know that."

"I know, but don't you think you're going to change your mind in the future? I mean, you're still young—"

Elsa sighed. "I'm twenty-three years old. You know I'm firmly on the shelf by now."

"But you're queen! I'm sure—" Anna began to protest.

"Please drop it," Elsa cut in quietly. "You're all the family I need, Anna. You, Kristoff, and your child. I just…I can't."

A pause, then a hesitant, whispered why came from Anna. "I'm asking because I worry about who will take care of you. You know how…uncertain life can be." Turquoise eyes bored into hers. "I don't want you to be alone if—"

"I am NOT going to let that happen," Elsa retorted, her tone flat as she slashed a hand through the air. Frost escaped from her fingertips, and she took a breath to calm herself down.

"I know that," Anna placated her, squeezing her hand reassuringly. "But there's another why you don't want to marry, am I right?"

 _It's easier._ Shame burned the back of her throat. Now that she thought about it, it was rather selfish of her to place that burden on Anna's shoulders. It was her duty, after all. And Anna was right—life was uncertain. What if she could bear children and Anna couldn't?

And was her happiness truly that dependent on Anna's? Why can't she find a happiness separate from her sister's? When will she be able to truly stand on her own? She had sung about letting go up on the North Mountain, but as she is finding out right now, she couldn't.

"I'll think about it," she fobbed Anna off, her voice sounding weak to her ears. "Let's pay for the dress, if you're sure about it, alright?"

Elsa was thankful that Anna decided kept her mouth shut after that.

* * *

The clock down the hall of his rented townhouse struck nine 'o clock in the evening. Tadashi lay on his four-poster bed, staring at the canopy above him as he tried to calm his buzzing mind with a zen koan. The one he had been repeating mentally was titled "If You Love, Love Openly."

Of all the koans he could have chosen, it had to be that one. But he could not forget the striking blue eyes that haunted his dreams for the past three months. Sighing impatiently at himself, he got out of bed and rummaged the closet for his gi and hakama. He didn't care if he looked out of place—it was late, people are asleep by now.

"Where are you going?" a voice behind Tadashi asked just as he was tucking his sword into his obi.

"Out. I need to practice. I'm getting rusty," he replied over his shoulder. "I should be back in three hours."

"Don't you need someone to spar with?" Gogo, his retainer, asked, crossing her arms over her chest. A female bodyguard was unheard of, but she was trained in the shadow arts, keeping him covered as he fought by his emperor's side against the shogunate's forces. After the civil war, she served as his eyes and ears when the victorious emperor scrabbled to get his country back in order from the disaster the civil war left behind. It was because of her loyal service that he was able to serve his emperor well, earning him a chance to further his family's honor as an ambassador to Arendelle.

Tadashi was nearing the end of his three-month ambassadorship now, which he supposed he should be thankful for—he had been loath to leave his brother Hiro behind. He had been successful in his mission, securing a trade agreement which stipulated that Arendelle will purchase silks only from his country. It would not be a hugely profitable enterprise considering the distance between the countries and Arendelle's economy and minimal influence in the West, but it was a good beginning for an upstart like him. His country needed all the help it can get to recover from civil war.

But he found himself reluctant to leave. Why? Because of a supposed connection with Arendelle's queen? It was a preposterous thought, and yet—

"Master Hamada?" Gogo prompted.

"No, I'll be fine on my own. I need to work some things out, anyway. Thank you, Gogo." He dismissed her with a small nod and a smile.

Despite the lateness, Tadashi did his best to head to the forest unobtrusively. The sound of snow crunching beneath his feet and his heavy breaths formed a strange rhythm, which helped him center his thoughts in preparation for his sword practice. But his sharp ears caught a faint melody. Someone was humming. A lullaby, perhaps? But out here in the woods? Tadashi frowned, his hand tightening on his scabbard—he knew it was against his better judgment, but he decided to follow the sound of the voice.

It wasn't a lullaby. Someone—a woman—was singing about doing her duty and pursuing her happiness. Of being true to herself without being selfish. Tadashi leaned against the tree, closing his eyes and listening to the woman's mesmerizing voice—he felt her vulnerability as she sang about defying expectations of her, and her strength as she worried about placing her burden on others. He was close enough to reveal himself to her, but he refrained from doing so—he knew he was intruding on a private moment, yet he couldn't stay away.

Unfortunately, an animal from somewhere up the tree moved and dislodged some snow from the branches and onto him. The sudden shock of cold caused him to yelp in surprise and flail madly about. He heard a scream and caught a flash of light from the corner of his eye, then next thing he knew, his feet were frozen in place.

Literally.

"Nani—" he sputtered, fumbling for his sword.

"Don't move," the woman behind him warned. "Because I'll freeze more than your feet if you do."

 _Freeze?_

Tadashi raised his arms slowly to show he meant no harm. "Ano, sumimasen," he began, trying to keep the tremor of fear from his voice, "anata wa yuki no onna desu ka?"

"Excuse me?" the ice crept up to cover his calves completely.

"I said, are you a snow woman?" He hoped Western snow spirits were not as vengeful as Far Eastern ones.

The woman answered after an agonizing minute. "You might say that," she replied neutrally.

"I didn't mean to intrude, my lady," Tadashi apologized. "I just…I heard you singing, and, well, I listened. I couldn't help but do so. I suppose that is part of your charm as a Western yuki-onna." He winced, but then he supposed he was in deep enough trouble already.

"Someone had called me that once…" Her voice trailed off. "Ambassador Hamada?"

Something in his brain clicked. Unable to curb his curiosity any longer, he looked over his shoulder before his jaw dropped open in surprise.

"Queen…Elsa?"


End file.
